points: 26

How To Survive Prison Guide

Do's and Don't while serving time behind bars

featuredfunny

by thatdude420

submitted April 14th 2012

75 comments
what do you think? let everyone know!
How To Survive Prison Guide
tagged:
comments (75)
hey how about not doing anything dumb and then you wont end up in chokey in the first place
6 years ago
yup :(
6 years ago
Lets playyyyyyy "Guess the Offence"!!!
6 years ago
Arson
6 years ago
fucking noob
6 years ago
lol
6 years ago
not ready to make light of it I take it
6 years ago
MD is starting to irritate me
6 years ago
Drugs.
6 years ago
Okay, that was in bad taste. No harm intended.
6 years ago
not offended, just irritated @ your noobyness...
6 years ago
I concur.
6 years ago
Holy shit...hiys Jones!
6 years ago
arfarfarfarf

...arf?
6 years ago
Arf.. Also, I am barfck.. Although this is probably going to be a bitter sweet reunion.
6 years ago
why so?
6 years ago
for why?
6 years ago
* possum does not have a good feeling about this *
6 years ago
Damn, I thought I was doing ok. Point taken though.
6 years ago
I got the letter regarding my next ship. I'll be gone for another 2.5 months from the 23.. :(
6 years ago
I am feed up with sailing and all the drama there's been on the vessel right now and just want some vacation, but I won't drop out before I find something else to do.
6 years ago
* possum says whew... *


i thought you were gonna go all great dane on us for a sec or somfin
6 years ago
damn man :-/
6 years ago
* possum subs a shitty vid in yer honor now *
6 years ago
Fuck man, another 3 months without internet, tv and alcohol, and with only Filipinos to keep me company is fucking just what I need to go great dane.
6 years ago
bonus - it's most likely a squidley - butt at least i did a search or three
6 years ago
@jones - girl filipinos or boy filipinos?

...or "neither"?
6 years ago
Jesus man, point of advice - never sail with a girl cadet along.
Things went a-fucking haywire with the chief officer cutting his wrist and fucking us over with out appraisals, 2 Filipinos proposing marriage, our training officer going mad and drunk and threatening us with a knife and with failing us, all because she rejected them.
6 years ago
Wouldn't 'neither' be considered 'both'?
* Jones gets a ragging ginaboner *
6 years ago
hehehehe
6 years ago
wow - i need to go asea
6 years ago
And to top it of, I didn't even get any from her!
6 years ago
*it
6 years ago
There's two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says,
"Do you know how to drive this thing?"
6 years ago
okay - i gotta crash, dog - have to get up in 8 hours to earn my kibble...thnks for checking in, and dont be a strange ranger
6 years ago
Jones, stay the fuck away from military relationships....
There is a reason most women in the military are there and desirable reasons they are not. (I said most not all)
6 years ago
Hi puppy :)
6 years ago
thatdude, you ever been Inside?
6 years ago
nope. and i plan on keeping it that way too.
6 years ago
pussy
6 years ago
faggot
6 years ago
^ pussy faggot
6 years ago
The whole 'mental health' part is a crock of shit.
6 years ago
you've done time too?
6 years ago
very little
6 years ago
Maybe not long enough for the crazy to set in then?
6 years ago
zeke is an atheist fag
6 years ago
jones you bastard - i see you!
6 years ago
like I told the guards..the difference between me and you is you dont know how close you are to being here..first offense 12 years manufacture controlled substance..by the way thats good advice on that poster...anybody wanna rip on me............lol
6 years ago
shut up
6 years ago
Big Mouths always cry right before shit goes down..you boot up and go to the shower and see how shit comes down..btw never had to swing on 1 person cause I was straight up/ no snitchin/ kept my personal biz personal/ dont talk about it be about it/...enough said!!!!
6 years ago
shut up
6 years ago
u did 12 yrs but yet u talk like a 16 yr old?
6 years ago
That's standardized education for you!
6 years ago
by mad skilz do you mean what you learned from being on the farm?
6 years ago
I wonder, was it a long arduous process to turn your sphincter into a hollow body cavity to hide drugs?
6 years ago
what a bitch...talk shit on the internet you pussies
5 years ago
look me up in kansas correctional bitches...Barrett Staton Manufacture Controlled Substance...I dont hide behind internet doors for all you name callers!!!!!!!!!!! lol
5 years ago
A kansas hardass
* squatface has seen it all *
5 years ago
hey, madskillz?.....






....shut up
5 years ago
I'll see if i can find a few prison handbooks I have around here and upload them the information is way better then this shit, there is a whole 4 pages on avoiding getting raped and what to do if you get raped lol
6 years ago
btw not my handbook my wifes ex husbands handbook
6 years ago
hahaha...your wife had sex with a prisoner
6 years ago
his wife is a whore
6 years ago
Obviously he doesn't know shit you 15 yr old internet pussy
5 years ago
shut up
5 years ago
Don't do the crime unless you want to do the time.
6 years ago
poor Barretta
6 years ago
Yea snitches get stiches or maybe a arrow from a crossbow...lol
5 years ago
shut up
5 years ago
Don't forget the "soap on a rope".
6 years ago
No sorry, Zest, Irish spring, swave... thats what we have
5 years ago
shut up
5 years ago
I like this site and Ive been on here for at least 10years I just dont have to belittle others to make myself feel better
5 years ago
shut up,and lrn to math before yu lie
5 years ago
recover password
most discussed