points: 35

My Special Valentine Just For You

I've been having lower abdominal cramps now for two days. I had three shits all in a matter of an hour and a half just like this although the second one was a much deeper red. I know it's not the log you were expecting, but at least I got the color right.

featuredmuchoers gone wild

by toolman961

submitted February 11th 2012

143 comments
what do you think? let everyone know!
tagged:
comments (143)
I know what you all are going to say so just save it. I'm feeling rather sick so I posted it just in case. Like I always say, today is always a good day to die.
6 years ago
:( I can't raise all our mucho children on my own
6 years ago
Blood in the stool can be bright red, maroon in color, black and tarry, or occult (not visible to the naked eye). Causes of blood in stool range from harmless, annoying conditions of the gastrointestinal tract such as hemorrhoids to serious conditions such as cancer. Blood in the stool should be evaluated by a healthcare professional.
6 years ago
go see a doctor, tool!
6 years ago
agreed - get to clinic tool
6 years ago
I can't even pay the orthodontist this month, I've got no choice except pass out and hope the wife can press her medical alert button.
6 years ago
How much would a doctor visit normally cost?
6 years ago
are you at least taking roladis or something?
6 years ago
In the states it can cost a fortune if you don't have insurance..
6 years ago
Fuck universal healthcare!!
6 years ago
Even the French would be able to get this shit sorted.
6 years ago
Don't you guys have free hospitals where all the black people go with gunshot wounds?
6 years ago
but they cant turn you away if it's an emergency - tool, go NOW
6 years ago
I have to fix my leak in my water softener today while the wife and kid are at the Carnegie History Center.
6 years ago
^last seen: 38 minutes ago
6 years ago
hopefully he's gone to the hospital
6 years ago
More likely that hes away struggling with the pain due to his belly cancer.
6 years ago
I'm back. Fixed the leak, straped down the romex at the box from the electrical box I put in the other day, fixed an extension cord, went down to the club and had two beers and signed the daily book, it's up to $375 today, came home and made meat loaf, homemade mashed potatoes and sweet corn again, and just finished doing the dishes. A housewife's work is never done. Still feel nausiated and maybe going to take a squat on the cosmic utensil, feels like ones brewing. Thanks for the concern all, but that's just not me. I'm looking forward to my next life with cuntscab.
6 years ago
Tool....stop drinking and go to a fucking doctor.
6 years ago
Why? When I'm out of blood, it will stop.
6 years ago
Come on man, don't be stubborn. Set aside your pride and take care of yourself.
6 years ago
God damnit Tool your wife fucking needs you , go see a doctor...
6 years ago
at least register for the cbs.com contest to go to new york and get a colonoscopy. the ozzy osborne thing
6 years ago
TOOL...! AREN'T YOU THE SAME MAN ON HERE WITH ALL THE SICK POSTS? TALKING VULGAR TO YOUR WIFE AS SHE EXPLAINS ABOUT YOU BALLS , WHILE YOUR DAUGHTER IS IN FRONT OF YOU? YES AND AREN'T YOU THE SAME MAN THAT LIKES TOO KILL HARMLESS LITTLE HELPLESS ANIMALS!

WOW I AM SHOCKED YOU HAVE A STD FROM WHAT YOU DO ON THE SIDE FOR EXTRA MONEYS! YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE TO LE ED AND LIVE A HEALTHY, PRODUCTIVE, LIFE BUT YOU CHOSE TO KILL SMALL LITTLE ANIMALS THAT YOU TRAP AND TORCHER! AND OTHER SICK STUFF!

YOU LIVE BY THE SWORD ! YOU DIE BY THE SWORD ! SUNNY! MAY GOD BE AND EXCEPT YOU!
6 years ago
ulcer
6 years ago
Nah, a stomach ulcer would have the blood sitting around for a while. That's pretty bright red, so it's fresher blood and more likely a hemorrhoid.

That said: hospital, toolamn. Do it now.
6 years ago
hemorrhoids cause abdominal pain smerf?
6 years ago
Our resident not a doctor has spoken.
6 years ago
i wonder what Dr. McCoy would say....
6 years ago
damnit jim i'm a doctor not a doct.. oh wait.
6 years ago
The bright red color does indicate that it was fresher blood and more likely from the lower intestine. Proctitis, colon polyps, diverticulitis, hemorrhoids and Crohn's Disease could all cause symptoms you've described.

How big around was the feces?
6 years ago
Either way most of the people on here are correct: you should get to a doctor or hospital.

You may or may not want to ignore Bichofelix.
6 years ago
* yak makes communicator sound *

6 years ago
Hey, possum did ask.
6 years ago
Thanks, Bones.
6 years ago
Yeah, smerf is right, you're bleeding from your colon from something. Question is what. I don't know your history, so I'd rather not speculate. But you really need to get that shit checked out... pardon the pun. How long has this been going on?
6 years ago
Like he said in the description, lower abdominal pain for two days, shitting 3 times in 90 minutes and bloody stool.
6 years ago
Tool, get yourself to a fucking hospital man!!

6 years ago
Are you sure you didn't just eat a lot of beets? :P
6 years ago
I wish. Last night I made boneless pork chops and red potatoes with corn.
6 years ago
Yummy. Will you be my wifey?
6 years ago
That would require some form of commitment for you cunty, no more sleeping around.
6 years ago
While you're in the thought process, you should consider having your cunt scabs checked out.
6 years ago
You're annoying and unoriginal, please stop before yak steps in again
6 years ago
haha kangaroo jack is picking on people
6 years ago
haha silly cow
6 years ago
"Please stop." Funny, this incessant trolling is exactly what you did to me... hypocrite much. =)
6 years ago
eat balls boomergangsucker you follow me around ill do it way worse crikey
6 years ago
Don't you just want to stone fluffer to death??
6 years ago
I wouldn't mind watching her successfully slit her wrists
6 years ago
Don't you just want to stick a toupee on oranje?
6 years ago
I'm so far out of you league fluffer, I wouldn't even let you suck my dick in the back of a taxi.
6 years ago
Is that what you call your parent's basement?
6 years ago
Nah, Oj owns the receeding hairline look.
6 years ago
youre out of your element you pinhead aussie zeldapig
6 years ago
i can do this for literally years.
6 years ago
You mad bro?
6 years ago
youbet koala slut
6 years ago
Well, that was far too easy.
6 years ago
I can't believe how pointy face just tried to twist that into a 'you live in your parents basement' line. It's like a failed comebacks for dummies routine.

My parents house doesn't have a basement, and neither does my apartment.
6 years ago
Up the anti!
6 years ago
you're a douchebag
6 years ago
what are you going to do digereewhore get yak to ban me? you plumped up aussie toad
6 years ago
Whos in Team fluffer?

Anyone tolerate this stupid cunt?
6 years ago
to be fair we wouldnt be missing much if i banned you dik :PPP
6 years ago
I don't join "teams" but I find her more than tolerable. Of course I don't read half this shit, but I generally ignore you too oranjeboom. Only way you're tolerable as well.
6 years ago
I tried tolerating her, but she comes across as a bitchy fake.
6 years ago
Well you're like a boring cockroach that appears every now & again acting like a drunk retard, so keep ignoring me, xzekiel.
6 years ago
i can tolerate just about everyone on MS..."like" is another story
6 years ago
will do you arrogant prick
6 years ago
I quite like it when little people call me arrogant etc.
6 years ago
at least Oj's not putting on a show for approval. Fluffer's tried many different angles so far. Zelda nerd, slut, conservative, troll, bitch, etc.
6 years ago
Oj are you familiar with the Dunning-Kruger effect?
6 years ago
just googled it, and you probably know what I'm thinking
6 years ago
Yes, xzekiel, & I knew of it before it was posted on MS, you uneducated faggot.
6 years ago
As did I....there you go on your superiority trip again.
6 years ago
So bitter sweet
6 years ago
you go to hell yak
6 years ago
You're a turd, I'm awesome & modesty is for losers.
6 years ago
OMGOMG! Its a bitch fight! Cheese Everywhere! If you were dumb enough to post your shit, best not point fingers at another muchotard for the same shit. Fluffer you have a great body, you would be best to dress in a paper bag with a glory hole. cuntscab, well i would fuck you long time then toss you out like a bangbus video. the rest of you losers can still suck 300lb man brown-eye.
6 years ago
Oh and toolman, you really need to go see somebody w/ a job... like a doctor.
6 years ago
Shut the fuck up you 4 year old noob.
6 years ago
fuck off fluff. that nickname suits you because thats all you are. a superfluous, vacant, vapid, piece of fluff with no real substance
6 years ago
Your so original sporty. don't worry im not going to take your friends and family away... your alcoholism is doing it just fine. Hope you find that big dream of yours in that next empty!
6 years ago
^Who is this guy?
6 years ago
No fucking clue. Just some schmuck that pops up every so often.
6 years ago
SPORTY SO THAT'S WHY YOU ARE A SINNER!.... YOU POOR UNEMPLOYED LAZY ALCOHOLIC BUM FUCK.
6 years ago
THIS SITE HAS A LOT OF SINNERS AND SPECIAL NEEDS PEOPLE HERE.
6 years ago
* possum finds a speck of dust and pats at it *
6 years ago
* Vomitcircus finds what poss is doing highly entertaining *
6 years ago
* Sporty farts and leaves the room *
6 years ago
lol@koala slut
6 years ago
i remember when i was young and went to the bathroom and started pissing just a solid stream of blood...
good times good times..
6 years ago
wtf?
6 years ago
I head a story about a fishing net?
6 years ago
*heard
6 years ago
possum i had kidney stones when i was young thats how i found out :P
6 years ago
ick
6 years ago
that would be terrifyingly awesome.....to watch
6 years ago
I once had a piss stream that was aquamarine blue! True story.
6 years ago
yea i pretty much had a panic attack when i was just peeing normal then all of a sudden it turned blood red
i freaked
6 years ago
no pain?...i thought kidney stones hurt like hell
6 years ago
thats just when they hit your kidney walls and stuff or when you pass them... and yea.. the pain sometimes when they kinda moved around.... worst pain ever... made you all sick to your stomach and stuff and its not like its a normal physical pain cuz its internal in an organ.. it feels really different
quite horrible ;/
6 years ago
* possum feels queasy just reading that *
6 years ago
how was passing it?
6 years ago
What's the fishing net story, yak?
6 years ago
passing them wasnt horrible pedro... basically i was pissing... my pee stopped and i was like wtf?? bit of pressure and a bit of pain then POP pee again and they were passed
but i have a pretty massive wang..
and they were very small
6 years ago
scab i think hes probably referring to the fact that when i pissed everytime i pissed peed into a little fishnet like for aquariums incase i passed them it would catch it so i could take them to the doctor rather than trying to fish them out of the toilet...
turned out it didnt matter because i ended up passing them at a movie theater bathroom ;/
6 years ago
What size?
6 years ago
What did the aquarium want with your kidneystones?
6 years ago
oh like... the size of like a fruit fly wing or something
2 of them
the doctor wanted them to study to see the likely cause etc
6 years ago
I remember I started pissing blood once when I was 18.

I had stopped masturbating for about 2 weeks, and the fluid buildup had swollen my prostate, which pressed it against the wall of my rectum and caused it to get an e. coli infection.

Doctor's orders? Take these antibiotics and either start masturbating or get laid.
6 years ago
Stop masturbating your prostate from your asshole and you probably could have avoided the whole embarassement.
6 years ago
You know, I really should have seen that comment coming.
6 years ago
Dammit Jim! If you can't masturbate your prostate from your asshole...how else are you supposed to reach it?!?!?
6 years ago
Smerf, you should know better.
Sporto, I dunno, but i'm sure you'll figure it out.
6 years ago
I feel bad up-voting the Toolmans demise, but it is pretty Mucho worthy.
6 years ago
You have the Roids, you need to see a gastrologist..I had them too..You need to start doing this if you don't want to feel the annoying itching..Do this, after you are done taking a shit, jump inside the shower, lather some soap on your hands and wash your anus thoroughly..Do this and you won't feel the itching and the pain of the roids..Don't just wipe your ass with some toilet paper and leave the bathroom, jump inside the shower instead and wash it..that will keep you anus clean and no left over shit will damage and infecte the open scars..hope it helps..and start exercising too..
6 years ago
then take some lube and start to work up to a fist like bicho
6 years ago
Fuck no..My little tooch had already too much problems with the roids.
6 years ago
Do this in remembrance of me...
6 years ago
^ Winner.
6 years ago
^Loser.
6 years ago
i miss whitney you never gonna be missed tomato ass!
6 years ago
hi box
6 years ago
hi and bye bless you all!
6 years ago
seems like box has finally outgrown this site...kudos, man

will you at least compose a farewell message, sir?
6 years ago
too much beetroot
6 years ago
I don't even know what that is.
6 years ago
Beets are made up of beetroot and beet greens. The greens are (surprise) green, while the beetroot (often just referred to as "beets" in the States) is red and will turn your shit red.

I doubt toolman has been eating them. Too much fiber for him to be eating.
6 years ago
so there are systems in place for people in your situation tool, where you can go to the hospital and get treated for free. You pay into medicare for this reason. If you don't believe in it or whatever and you continue having issues then it's your fault because you don't go get treated.

You have no sympathy from me
6 years ago
First of drums, I'm not looking for any sympathy and second, you don't think I've been up, around, under, and through that door in the last three years going through what I've been through? Just what my wife makes in SSDI, we're over the limit to get any government or state funding on anything. You find out what it is you're talking about and send it to me, toolman961@comcast.net, and I'll see how fast they say NO!
6 years ago
Please
6 years ago
well in that case, that sucks, however you should visit a doctor, somehow, someway
6 years ago
I can walk into any hospital around and be treated, but I'll get a bill for around, at least $1,500.00 if not more depending on what they do. I'm already maxed out and can't pay some of my utilities as it is. The sad thing is, I've been offered jobs that I've been applying for but when I tell them that I have to be home at a certain time each day, I can't work weekends and can't do any overtime unless it's early in the morning, they don't call me back. Brinks armoured car service called me about a drivers position open and we talked and it ended with him telling me he was going to send me an E:mail and we'll get started on me getting the job, and he never sent the E:mail. Story of my life, a day late and a dollar short.
6 years ago
Dumb question Tooly, did you call him back again?
6 years ago
not really a job but if your good at transcriptions and other odd shit (last one i did was telling a lawyer some drug have he headaches and it paid 28 dollars for 2 minutes work) www.mturk.com pays....I know does not pay a lot but I made around 500 in a week and a half
6 years ago
also if you have banking problems they can just give you amazon credit and amazon sells everything form food to medical supplies
6 years ago
Tool, are you your wife's "primary care-giver"?...if so you could get the ADA folks to fight for you...ie: getting a flexible-schedule job
6 years ago
You sound like Jack Nicholson.
6 years ago
Tool, a guy in my work had the blood in the stools thing, ignored it (keeping his fingers crossed & squeezing his eyes shut did NOT work) and presto, couple of years later we were doing the whole New Orleans funeral number from "Live & Let Die".
Get it checked out in hospital, you close-up, high-res destroyer of backyard varmints!
6 years ago
this is the first thread from the weekend I have read but it already wins the most entertaining weekend post, good job at entertaining me you deranged lifeless fuckups.
6 years ago
lol this deserved more points
4 years ago
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