points: -6

Call 991...........


by CoffeeCan

submitted January 23rd 2012

what do you think? let everyone know!
comments (69)
Why call 991?
6 years ago
Different countries have different numbers for emergency services.
6 years ago
991 seems to be for Zambia.
6 years ago
someone says 'dial 999' ... and the fact that they are british
6 years ago
That's practically how it works on mucho, too.

"Get your tits out! Oh my god, hahahahah *crash*"
6 years ago
Damn i was going to write that.
6 years ago
Thinking of breasts
They laughed hard with glee,
But then they all crashed,
Those ugly Brits three.
6 years ago
1 brit, 2 brits, 3 brits, 4, 5 brits, 6 brits, 7 brits, gore.
6 years ago
Hello Mr. Brady,
or shall I say Mr. Reed?
Don't make light of my rhyming
As it comes out of need.

Mucho is boring,
A snoozer, a wash!
I became a poet
to add some panache.

10 episodes left,
Don't miss a one.
I promise on your balls,
It will be fucking fun.
6 years ago
Hello to you bono, my buddy, my guy. I can't rhyme for shit, though hard I do try.

Mucho has become kinda lame,
it has become so pussified, so civil, so tame.

The policy was once tits or GTFO,
now hoes can show nothing and still steal the show.
Kissing their asses, making a big scene,
I will always be the number one queen.

6 years ago
Part of the problem,
My 1970s lover
But more lies in store
To be fucking uncovered.

The lies, the slander,
Even a few unpopular truths,
They couldn't escape the e-peen
of this jocular sleuth.

Revelations will come
Before Bono goes,
So I urge you to watch
til the end of the show.
6 years ago
I watch, I watch, I watch with bacon breath,
Yes I enjoy bacon, bacon and meth.

Though sausage ain't bad, and it has more uses,
some could get off with it, while others use nooses.

I love the 70s, you're right about that.
Thick mustash and chest hair, often crusty with scat.

I'm really not as gay as I might appear,
though I will admit I appear mighty queer.
Sometimes I troll for a reaction, anger and flame
but as I mentioned before these pussies are quite tame.

6 years ago
Bono you left me no rhyme to reply.
You sleeping? you pooping? did you fall in and die?
Forgive me for playing on your sister's miscarriage,
though the religious would say, bitch should've saved it for marriage.

Now me, I love kids. Got six of my own.
Actually three are step kids in which I can bone.
Of course they're all grown,
I sure as hell ain't no pedo.
Though you should see me at the waterpark, creepy grin and a speedo.
Oh the fright on their faces for my barely concealed dong,
but not a whole lot of bulge at only 3 inches long.
Some laugh and point, some look the other way.
Some whisper, some shout, some casually say:
'He's tall, he's broad, he's built like a house.
but look, fuckin' hell, he's hung like a mouse!'

I don't lure with a dick I use these eyes and this perm,
My looks and my charm have them craving my worm.
When they take the bait, when all is revealed,
It's far too late, their fate has been sealed.

6 years ago
Sex with children truly is
A stronger man's sport,
Holding down kiddies
To watch them contort.

I'd need a few pills,
A needle, some candy,
Only THEN I'd be able
To get really randy.

Their faces would be red,
And their little butts black as coal,
Now where is my dildo?
Let's rock and roll.

I'm glad we've bonded
Over under-aged mates...
Now let's quit talking
And make some play dates.
6 years ago
fucking cruel and hank
6 years ago
god fucking damnit, this shit again?!
* dwhill05 goes into a rage fit *
6 years ago
D Dubya is ragin', D Dubya is mad,
Mr Brady hands D Dubya a heavy flow maxi pad.
He's called me a nuisance, he's called me a whore
This led me to believe his lil button was sore.
I gave him some vaseline and sent him to bed,
but not before spit shining his mushroom shaped head.
D dubya's still angry, still somewhat feared,
but at least now he allows me suck on his beard.

6 years ago
you sound a little butthurt, i must have hurt your feelings at some point in the past
6 years ago
Bono's writing "poetry"....this dipshit turns it into rap.
6 years ago
badly written poetry is no better than rap. the ability to rhythm is not impressive, save this shit for your blog
6 years ago
Mr Brady, it would be much appreciated if you kept your filthy lips away from dw's beard.
6 years ago
Cuntscab is mad,
Cuntscab is jealous,
Mr. Brady's advances
Were a bit overzealous.

It appears our dear Cunty
Has a thing for Hill's face.
She also has a thing for me,
And that thing is called mace.
6 years ago
line five is longer than line six, FAIL!
6 years ago
Cruel?... Hank?... Have they returned in spirit?
6 years ago
mr brady could be cruel but bono just wishes he was hank
6 years ago
Xzekiel thinks I'm rapping,
and calls me dipshit.
It would seem he also has sand on the clit.
I'll tell you right now the tears oh they'll flow,
for zeke is known to be a sensitive joe.

Bono was mean to him, I'm sure twas in chat,
Boy was he hurt, over this little spat.
He copied and pasted, and cried did he ever,
clearly any likeness of a nutsack was severed.

Now cuntscab, she's shown a nipple and slit,
though she doesn't say much unless it pertains to her shit.
D Dubya happens to like this poo speak,
He asks for some video of a turtle head peak.

Jones is a good dog, kinda artsy fartsy,
His mucho lady is alena, wow what a set of dick sucking lips on her.

6 years ago
kinda fell apart there at the end, you two rapfags about rhymed out?
6 years ago
I found that one quite enjoyable
6 years ago
Rhymed out? Pshh, keep dreamin',
keep giving me material, I'll give you a reamin'.
6 years ago
Annnnd end thread.
6 years ago
*Thread re-opened*
6 years ago
for mr.brady

You fuckface,
i slap you in your motha fucking face,
you piece of shit ,
spread thoose leg motha fucking leg,
you´re an dipshit, you know that .
FUCKING RETARD, you live in a cardbox
MAAAN eating thoose can foodz .
Fucking scavenger i eat you up ,
you aint more then a beetle. TUrd.....im done
6 years ago
These men think they are funny,
witty, clever, and punny.
Oh, but funny they are not,
The wit of peas they've got.
Working hard to form up rhymes,
That grate like Liam Neeson lines.
These two should really stop,
for my eyes are about pop.
I pray that you two never quit your day job,
or cleaning up rancid semen after jrob.
For we muchoers have had our fill,
or your shitty poetry sorely lacking in skill.
6 years ago
ah shit mother fucker god damn
6 years ago
This lot of twats
Busting poems on mucho
Bunch of losers.
6 years ago
mine was was going to
"These men think they are funny,
witty, clever, and punny.
But youre not so shut the fuck up."

Fuck you bono, now Mucho has turned to a bunch of softy Mark Twain types.
6 years ago
smerf if that was a
haiku, then you have failed dude
five seven five, bitch
6 years ago
Epic Kaychuk.
6 years ago
* dwhill05 seriously contemplates shooting himself, the computer, or making a hit list of mucho "rappers" *
6 years ago
* dwhill05 wanders off to find a three sided coin..... *
6 years ago
Drum, I wasn't sure if some of the words were considered 1 or 2 syllables.
6 years ago
Dwhill, roll a 6 sided die. 1 or 2, you. 3 or 4 computer. 5 or 6, "rappers."
6 years ago
smerf, in elementary I was tought to sound out the word with my hand under my chin
6 years ago
I made a promise to rhyme
And that's what I'll do,
Til either I get banned,
Or Zeke eats my poo.

It's no surprise
If I've started a trend.
EVERYONE copies Bono,
And Bono's shit never ends.

Love me or hate me,
Just try to debate me.
And you cannot escape me.
6 years ago
"It's no surprise
If I've started a trend."

no, no you didn't
6 years ago
you havent started anything, nothing about you is original or special
6 years ago
This all sucked.
6 years ago
I like their poetry
I think it's brilliant
So those who are haters
Be a little more compliant

I'm not very good
I don't try very hard
But i think this is entertaining
So don't be a bastard
6 years ago
I'm better than Drumrave.
I'm better than Kirk.
I'm better than you!
You big fat jerk.
6 years ago
that didn't rhyme
6 years ago
and he admitted hes not as good as me.
6 years ago
Kaychuck it goes without saying
You rhyme better than most.
Your people have supple pink lips
And feuds between coasts.

Songs about asses,
And guns for your kids
Buckets of chicken
That come without lids.

You niggers were built
to match word to word.
Me trying to beat you?
That's just absurd.

Fact is I'm white -
No matter HOW great I am...
But to find out who's best,
We'd need to battle on cam.
6 years ago
I really wouldn't mind going
a round, maybe two!

Besides, I made THIS,
You damn Jiggaboo.


6 years ago
challenge accepted ya fajjit
6 years ago
let the gay off begin!
6 years ago
You'll be in linguistic anguish
After you hear my ballistic language.

6 years ago
so when's this happening and will it be posted?
6 years ago
He can't even beat me
When I'm doing my worst.
So Kaychuk has the honor
of posting his first.
6 years ago
Kaychuk wants in on this little rap battle,
he is a negro, perhaps I should skeedaddle.
On second thought, I'm really not impressed with his rhymes,
but at least he's here trying, instead of committing crimes.

Let's hear some more Kaychuk, have you got the knack?
I should hope so, you are awfully black.
6 years ago
"now Mucho has turned to a bunch of softy Mark Twain types."

*Marky Mark
6 years ago
Dr. Seuss is rolling in his grave.
6 years ago
* Bono would not eat Green Eggs & Ham with oster, not on the coast or near a toaster. *
6 years ago
Would you eat them if he gave you blow? Would you eat them at his picture show?
Would you eat them here with drum? Better be quick if you really want some.
6 years ago
I would not, could not, SHOULD NOT INDEED
Eat anything tainted by Jrob's seed.

His semen's full of discharge;
Of that much we're sure...
Only Oster would eat a concoction
So foul and so pure.
6 years ago
His cum his green,
In case you missed what I meant,
I found that out
After THIS picture I sent.

6 years ago

I should stop correcting myself.
It's poetry after all.
Technically there are no rules.
So suck my balls.
6 years ago
and thats why woman shoudnt drive cars...
6 years ago
ah this is only reason #81
6 years ago
recover password
most discussed

below are mucho's most discussed submissions of the last 12 hours. join in on the discussion!