points: 21

Penisarm

NSFW

Back story for OJ : Russian doctors have conducted an 11-hour operation to replace a patient’s deformed penis with one grown on his forearm, the Moskovskiy Komsomolets daily reports. The 30-year-old Russian man had a defect from birth — his penis was crooked, two-and-a-half-inches long and lacked a scrotum, the newspaper writes. The doctors had the penis removed and attached to the man’s arm. Using his body tissue it grew to six-and-a-half inches and was sewn back on to his groin. Silicone tubes were inserted into the organ to ensure an erection was possible. Doctors also created a scrotum from the patient’s own skin and placed silicone testicles in it. A Moscow surgeon said the man will be able to have sex in a few months. He added: “Women will never suspect it is artificial.” How long can these descriptions go anyway? Just for added gayness ill add a joke from some random joke-site and see how far it goes. ATM A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE and FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender: MALE PROCEDURE 1. Drive up to the cash machine. 2. Put down your car window. 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw. 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt. 6. Put window up. 7. Drive off. FEMALE PROCEDURE 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card. 5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up. 6. Attempt to insert card into machine. 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car. 8. Insert card. 9. Re-insert card the right way. 10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page. 11. Enter PIN. 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN. 13. Enter amount of cash required. 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror. 15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside. 17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook. 18. Re-check makeup. 19. Drive forward 2 feet. 20. Reverse back to cash machine. 21. Retrieve card. 22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided. 23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you. 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off. 25. Redial person on cell phone. 26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles. 27. Release Parking Brake. Still going? What the fuck...I give up.

featuredwtf

by Barret

submitted September 22nd 2011

8 comments
what do you think? let everyone know!
Penisarm
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comments (8)
well fuck the describtion , i aint reading all that bullshit
6 years ago
downvote just for that. You could have posted that text as the first comment barrot you idiot
6 years ago
or a fucking link for that matter
6 years ago
WHAT THE FUCK?! So the description isn't really *that* long but this assvag decides it would be funny to paste a completely asinine joke that wasn't even funny :(((

I hate you so much right now barret
6 years ago
Thanks drums you made my day a little more meaningful
6 years ago
I still love those lips Barret.
6 years ago
this is the greatest description ever
5 years ago
Great way to get my foreskin back.
5 years ago
recover password