points: 31

Another Toolman Service Announcement

And yes, I have put on nearly 40 pounds since my last announcement. Fuck, I ain't worked in 18 months and been hittin the club and the beffet pretty hard. Fuck You!

featuredmuchoers gone wild

by toolman961

submitted May 5th 2010

277 comments
what do you think? let everyone know!
tagged:
comments (277)
lmao, that was fucking awesome. toolman is the shit!
7 years ago
... on the bottom of my shoe
7 years ago
You just didn't like his target. I, on the other hand, think it's awesome!
7 years ago
I made that target on my printer just because of my last video when BBBTyrone said, why does he have to be black. I did it for you sir.
7 years ago
Hey tool, I've hit my glass ceiling at around 31-33 seconds on that red/blue sqaure game.

I'm using someone elses piece of shit laptop though, I'm gonna try it on one where the game isn't so jumpy. I'm moving the red square at the moment without seeing where it is going as I move it, so judging distance is a bitch.

Cool though.
7 years ago
Damn, I only made it to 13 seconds on my last try and deleted it before I got pissed.
7 years ago
i actually loved the target... much appreciated tool
7 years ago
fuck that fucking square!

11 secs btw
7 years ago
That thing sucked, didn't it?
7 years ago
totally.
7 years ago
square game? is this some gay chat thing? fucking queers
7 years ago
Part of the news letter. Just give me your Email.
7 years ago
Hook me up tool. s4b3rw0lf@live.com
7 years ago
wtf is this newsletter thingy?
7 years ago
lmao...just got an email from john cruz "bassmasta6@yahoo.com" with a pic of a nutsack...what kind of homo has a nutsack jpeg on his hard drive?
7 years ago
^ why possum doesnt sign-up to much
7 years ago
I'n sorry but anything less than 14 seconds is just retarded, thats like that start of the game.

I hit 43 btw.
7 years ago
it was mine, you fuckin liked it.
7 years ago
Are you serious DB?? lol
7 years ago
i dont care about reality anymore, people arw annyoed with me about telling them their unts for not voting labour.
7 years ago
u spellinged things worng.
7 years ago
oh god.i swear to fuck im trying!
7 years ago
of course.
7 years ago
thanks toolman but i'll pass on the newsletter. not my cup of tea
7 years ago
Just curl up in the fetal position oj and call it a night bro.
7 years ago
please OJ, listen to sporty
7 years ago
"it's just the dylexia talking - give the guy a break"
7 years ago
Don't listen to them, have another beer with your friend alec.
7 years ago
he uses lysdexia as a crutch enough without you helping, poss
7 years ago
i dont care, i bet id beat you all on that game.
7 years ago
im not on my laptop & this is fucked so beerfinger dont mix with a slow laptop.
7 years ago
I don't know the game you're speaking of 'cause toolie want send me the newsletter :_P
7 years ago
*possum now digs in "MS possibles" archives for that thingy aboot dyslexia*
7 years ago
what are you on aboot?
7 years ago
whoa! deja vu big time! (the experience, not the person)
*now knows what it's like to be possum*
i think that's my cue to go to bed...
7 years ago
no, stay up and have another beer with your friend alec.
7 years ago
*shoves another beer up your friend alec's ass*
7 years ago
dw = pussy
7 years ago
ingterpost, sorry
7 years ago
Am I going to be tested on this?
7 years ago
ingterpost? wow...
7 years ago
if possum's norm being my crazy makes me a pussy then so be it
7 years ago
Aw come on dw....stay a while and listen...
7 years ago
integerpost?
7 years ago
question 1 - are you willing to pay the price?

question 2 - if you ever met camy face-to-face, would you maybe make-out with him, maybe just a little?
7 years ago
listen to what?
OJ's crazy drunk rants?
alec's 'i love you' man comments?
possum just being possum?

... alright a little longer
7 years ago
predicatenominativepost?
7 years ago
hey, that's not a word!
7 years ago
yes it is dammit...'cause I just said it
7 years ago
1. i would need to know how much the price is before i would be willing to pay it
2. who wouldn't? i mean come on, he's so damn cute!
7 years ago
i love you guys.
7 years ago
i do not drunk rant.
7 years ago
you forgot the exclamation point.
7 years ago
i just rant. i do that sobor!

i was tryinng to tell some idiot who voted conservative he was wron earlier but i was accused of being 'always right' but i was ust telling him why he ws wrong
7 years ago
i fucking hate students thought, those kids are fucking useless.

full of confidence but clueless as hell.
7 years ago
OJ's normal rants + drunk = drunk rants
7 years ago
Stop with all these equations!

You and your higher education.
7 years ago
alec, quick! what is the derivative of x^2 + 2x?
7 years ago
OJ's drunk rants beat most peeps sober rants all to pieces.
7 years ago
Ummmm, well..... ummmm

I'm going to go ahead and take the liberty of blaming my stupidity on beer instead of the fact that I have no mathematical at all.
7 years ago
I have no mathematical at all either
7 years ago
we cant be all perfect all
7 years ago
+1 team tautology team
7 years ago
Where can I find this notorious square puzzle?
7 years ago
*just so I can beat OJ's time and gloat.
7 years ago
As if, Roland. Never happen.
7 years ago
swill: x + 1/2x
7 years ago
actually the answer is 2x + 2, the exponent is added to whatever is being multiplied to the variable and then one is taken away from the exponent

nice try though, much better than most of the brainless fucks around here could do
7 years ago
7
7 years ago
are you saying x = 7 or 2x + 2 = 7? explain. and don't for get to show your work
7 years ago
*forget
7 years ago
I just took a really big dump.
7 years ago
Would you believe i had a double typo in my answer, swill?
7 years ago
thanks sporty....

sure kirk, but only from you :)
7 years ago
Exhibit A for Reasons Not To Fuck With Toolman.
7 years ago
indeed
7 years ago
exhibit B: he's on jesus patrol
7 years ago
I've been looking for Jesus for years and I still haven't found him.

I didn't know Toolman worked for immigration
7 years ago
alec, have you tried the corner of 1st and amistad?
7 years ago
I'm a nice guy.
7 years ago
so, how much did that cost tool?
BTW, we're drivin' up to take the kids to the pitt zoo tomorrow, maybe you stop by?
7 years ago
Maybe you bring a blazer!
7 years ago
maybe i give him a few days notice next time so he has time to straighten up the house
7 years ago
Probably under $10.00
Which way are you coming from. We have no aid tomorrow so I'll be home all day.
7 years ago
ha!! blew hank's nigger lips off
7 years ago
HAHAHAHA !!!
7 years ago
Heheheh.
7 years ago
LOLS!
7 years ago
*Laughs*
7 years ago
I guess that was pretty cool... Actually, that pretty much made my day... LOL at 0:35 and ur .22 cal.. Pckeww, pckeww, pckeww.. The gauger's made up for it though.. Lol..

With regrets of possibly sounding like an asslicker... You embrace everything cool about being american..
7 years ago
^asslicker
7 years ago
DAMMIT!!!
7 years ago
It was inevitable.
7 years ago
being venezuelan is way cooler
7 years ago
ha ha ha That's soo true...
7 years ago
Elpiss, you aren't Venezuelan, you're just a dirty gringo.
7 years ago
i have a venezuelan passport so fuck you
7 years ago
...and a norwegian and a spanish one
7 years ago
I don't give a shit where you have passports from. You're NOT Venezuelan, you are a gringo faggot.
7 years ago
my id says im venezuelan
7 years ago
you're the james bond of cock addicts.
7 years ago
agreed
7 years ago
... says the faggot that keeps yapping around here like a bitch. spammy cocksucker
7 years ago
sporty go whine to yak again asking to get me banned. wimp
7 years ago
Butthurt much?
7 years ago
only butthurt people whine for someone to get banned
7 years ago
yak should ban all of you fuckers.
7 years ago
How would he make any money then?
7 years ago
How is he making any money now?
7 years ago
I sit around at work all day and click on the ads for him.
7 years ago
i feel sorry for sporty's network admin
7 years ago
So do I, I use his computer as proxy for all my illegal shit.

Just don't tell him.
7 years ago
speaking of that. i showed one of our faculty docs at work how to use torrents a couple of months ago and a few weeks ago i got a call from our ISP saying we got a letter from a major production company saying we need to stop the illegal traffic. all my shit was clean so i go back there and he had two or three dozen torrents of movies and tv shows he had been seeding for weeks. i showed him how to delete the torrents and told him to not seed for more than a day or you will get busted
7 years ago
dw be a arkansian teacher fella?
7 years ago
dw be a 'arkansian' IT specialist at a family medicine residency clinic
7 years ago
could dw look at this weird thing on my leg?
7 years ago
*no homo*
7 years ago
dw be computer guy, not look at weird thing on my leg guy
7 years ago
thats dr. smerf
7 years ago
lol
7 years ago
Nurse*
7 years ago
nah really what are you again?
7 years ago
that a sig at :30?
7 years ago
Smith & Wesson SW40VE
7 years ago
Awesome Toolman. Skip the .22 next time. (Were there two of them?) Still great though, made me want to go shoot my AK.
7 years ago
The bolt action is a Savage Mark II
The semi is a Ruger 10-22
7 years ago
Was that background noise cars going by on the freeway?
7 years ago
Parkway West near Robinson, about the halfway point between PGH. and the airport. Just at the bottom of the hill behind me were the commutters.
7 years ago
I will never go down to Pitt via Route 19/60 again.
7 years ago
You're safe Captain, I was aiming for his head.
7 years ago
Thanks. But those tolls are beginning to suck though.
7 years ago
Hey tool. Next go blow holes in Falling Waters!
7 years ago
Just asked because it seemed weird to me. Here we go shooting way out in the middle of nowhere, but I suppose there's a lot less nowhere there than there is here.
7 years ago
wow, redneck couldent use half his guns the wright way hahaha
7 years ago
Couldent sounds like some new kind of fancy toothpaste, am I write, or did I rite that wrong?
7 years ago
I had thirteen loaded guns in the back of my truck, all chambered and cocked ready to fire. I was a little nervous. So I didn't take off the safety on the Derringer and I forgot to chamber the 40. And that's the first time I ever had a problem with the 270 at the end. That's a nice gun.
7 years ago
you are safe in a zombie apocalypse toolie
7 years ago
There is no room for misfires and forgetting to chamber rounds in the zombie apocalypse.
7 years ago
I heard wearing denim is your best bet at surviving a zombie apocalypse. Just a heads up.
7 years ago
Then dik is safe.
7 years ago
me too
7 years ago
The only reason you'd be safe is because zombies eat brains and you don't have any.
7 years ago
well if zombies ate cock you'd be No1
7 years ago
Yeah, #1 on their list of people to eat because I have a huge cock.
7 years ago
Fucking hell fries....that was more retarded than usual
7 years ago
i know , that didnt quite turn out as i had hoped
7 years ago
It's not even fun when you make it that easy.
7 years ago
Shakes head side to side
7 years ago
fries is a cock zombie
7 years ago
270 ok I thought it was an aught6 but nice guns either way. if your ever up here in gods country look me up
7 years ago
Where might that be?
7 years ago
Way the fuck over yonder.
7 years ago
i'm thinking oregon
7 years ago
nope you've got to go north to where the real mountains are
7 years ago
Cape Cod?
7 years ago
BC?
7 years ago
Nepal?
7 years ago
sasquatch=yeti?
7 years ago
wtf is wrong with you boy?
7 years ago
Not enough guns, obviously
7 years ago
Any man worth his salt would twice that many.
7 years ago
*have (I'm drunk, fuck off!)
7 years ago
I'm workin on it Roland, Guns are expensive you know, and it's hard to buy the Kimber 45 for nearly $1000.00 when I haven't worked in awhile.
And DB, that was fuckin fun!!!
7 years ago
Roland is gonna take me shooting when I visit America.

I'm gonna dress like a cowboy, but not in the gay way.
7 years ago
well you certainly seem to be able to afford bullets
7 years ago
I'll take you shooting and teach you how to drink like a man. No tea except for sweet and I'll introduce you to some girls that actually have all of their teeth.
7 years ago
Those have been in the safe for probably three years now. I need to get rid of them and buy new ones.
7 years ago
That would be fun Irish, but you can't as your a damn criminal!

No guns for you!
7 years ago
I know tool.
7 years ago
Oh, were you refering to plantshit going for my beer. I mean Hank.
7 years ago
Stop by my place and you can take the 4x4 truck out and run over some trees and shit. It's ok if you wreck it because I have 4 other vehicles. Fuck yeah.
7 years ago
Or stay in fagland and take the bus everywhere like a fucking homeless lesbian.
7 years ago
I'd love to break one of your cars, but I can't drive. If you have guns I'll happily shoot it up a little.
7 years ago
if you come to america, im gonna slap that tooth out of your mouth, take your wallet & run you over oranjebitch
7 years ago
Sure you are...

We all know that children are the only ones who you have ever overpowered.
7 years ago
Don't shoot at the truck. That's what minorities are for.
7 years ago
Being English is a minority
7 years ago
That's why you're invited too.
7 years ago
Fist Offenders, baby. I get my guns back very soon.
7 years ago
*First
7 years ago
Somehow I think you were right the first time
7 years ago
Sounds like a group a porn superheros.
7 years ago
yay 1rish1...even after a felony?...

*...moves to whatever state rish lives in now
7 years ago
1 year from now ill be postine a vid with me roland & wanko, presumably in as mask...
7 years ago
irsish the convixt too
7 years ago
you know what i mwan
7 years ago
mean dammit
7 years ago
so... a vid of the huge gay orgy all of you have planned?
7 years ago
no homo
7 years ago
I'd invite Dee-Dubya if I thought he could keep his trap shut for more than three seconds.
7 years ago
I sold a Kimber Pro-Carry II last month for well below a grand. You shoulda said something Tool, I would have given you a sweet deal.
7 years ago
i'd rather go to the dentist than hang out with roland. i'd be more bored than the time i got locked in the library (pre-internet) all weekend long
7 years ago
silly dw. you should have done what i did. masterbate to sanskrit literature
7 years ago
i could draw better tits at 10 then what those damned talentless sandniggers could manage in 500 years and it only took me a few hours to scour their entire nat geo collection of jungle bunny fun bags then i was left with the encyclopedia and grade school level sex education material to keep me busy
7 years ago
the drawings are the best part. it's like having sex with someone that has down syndrome
7 years ago
or like trying to masturbate to your mom or sister's girlie magazines or the women's underwear section of the department store catalog
7 years ago
No,Fuck you!!!
j/k

Nice show of firepower.
7 years ago
1:14... Is that a shotgun with a scope?
7 years ago
It's a slug gun homey, for killing deer and such.
7 years ago
Mossberg 835 with a slug master barrel. Here in Alleghney County, your not aloud to use high powered riffles for hunting so If I don't get one on the first day when I'm in the mountains, I use this around here. Which I just told on myself. I could have gotten in alot of trouble shooting the 270 and the two 223's not being at a range. But I would have gotten in trouble had I done this at the Colliers Sportsmans Club. They make you pause in between shots, so no going crazy with semi's.
7 years ago
Semi's just beg to be sprayed. It's a crime against them if you don't. Fuck Colliers Sportsman Club for being fucking evil assholes.
7 years ago
What? No Blunderbuss?
7 years ago
I dig it brother.
7 years ago
Epic: now in video form.
7 years ago
looks more like morph.
7 years ago
That's not nice, I did it to represent Hank.
7 years ago
Nice
7 years ago
Did you yell "shit the bed"?
7 years ago
I don't think so.
7 years ago
i heard it too.
7 years ago
With the 270 when it jammed I think. "Shit the bed!"
7 years ago
Yeah I did. I didn't even realize I said that.
7 years ago
hahaha
7 years ago
Hank lol

Needs more Beretta by the way
7 years ago
'Needs more Beretta', is like your very own 'needs more cowbell'.
7 years ago
'needs more beretta' needs more cowbell
7 years ago
well, the opposite is true as well.
7 years ago
I love you tool
7 years ago
I still love that mouth Barret.
7 years ago
Do you normally park your truck with a blanket and assortment of guns on the tailgate?
7 years ago
As if you all don't do that.
7 years ago
I bet Wanko has a AMC Pacer
7 years ago
Your mom is laying on a blanket on the tailgate of my truck.
7 years ago
If I would have got pulled over with that arsennal completely loaded in my truck, you guys wouldn't have seen this video for about 5 to 10 years. Wasn't nowhere close to the three step method.
7 years ago
They may have wondered what you were planning on doing. "I'm gonna shoot them at this here sign to make a video for mucho."
7 years ago
Remember to scream "fuck you hank" as you get tased and maybe get a copy of the dashboard video for us.
7 years ago
hahaha
7 years ago
I would have tried.
7 years ago
What is the "Three step method"? I'll assume it's one of those bullshit laws that render firearms useless while in transport?
7 years ago
Fucking classic! Nicely done bro!



hahahaha
7 years ago
crazy much?
7 years ago
ask him that while he is standing there with a tailgate covered in loaded guns
7 years ago
That just kind of proves his point dw ....
7 years ago
i have guns too. the difference is that i don't show them off as some sort of public attention-whore masturbation. and btw i *would* fucking ask him that while he was doing this.
7 years ago
lol @ the hypocritical internet tough guy. i bet you'd call tyrone a nigger to his face then slap his momma too?
7 years ago
What, none of you are going to say anything about my hat. I had that specially made for this video. But you all will have something to say about the shirt my wife bought me in Meadville because it contradicts everything about. Although, if those were real people, that patrol would have been a good day.
7 years ago
I can't even read it...wtf does it say?
7 years ago
ZAPPA
7 years ago
hah! Nice.
7 years ago
Meadville seems like a perfectly logical place to buy that shirt. Nice hat.
7 years ago
NOT diggin' the sign ....
7 years ago
hes had other pics and vids
with a sign
you fucking noob
7 years ago
I was talking about the "runnin nigger" thing

You fucking noob
7 years ago
Come on Camy, nothing intended, I was ripping on Hank.
7 years ago
oh ..i see camy
7 years ago
If you don't dig a shot-up sign with a nigger on it then you're a fucking noob.
7 years ago
I have seen that running nigger target a million times, but I also live in the south.
7 years ago
Yeah, but have you ever seen one that big?
7 years ago
Where I come from we have niggers as big as a white man.
7 years ago
And next with a short penis joke, we have Tyrone...
7 years ago
i was waiting for a rocket launcher or a stick of dynamite to come out for the final boom.... nice job tool.
7 years ago
No ones gives a fuck what you were waiting for, faggot.
7 years ago
Hell, you were probably waiting for your boyfriend to take his dick out of your ass so you could suck the turd collar off of it.
7 years ago
whoa now, that is some unpleasant imagery..
7 years ago
1rish1 doesnt need to image that , it's something he practises all the time
7 years ago
fries, we've seen what you bring to the table, you couldn't get a guy or a girl. You're asexual.
7 years ago
naysexual
7 years ago
Shit all that for a 30 of Natty Ice? Point taken, don't fuck with toolman!
7 years ago
's beer!
7 years ago
<---- Jealous as fuck :(
7 years ago
Can't you hide guns in all those holes in Blackburn, Lancashire?
7 years ago
You've gotta be joking, all those holes are full of illegal immigrants hiding from the authorities.
7 years ago
hey, just thanks tool for another funny/scary vid...

as long as ive been here, at least, you and smerf are the only MSers to post actual vids...(not counting the fake camwhores)...
7 years ago
Modern Warfare 3
7 years ago
^Modern Noobfag 1
7 years ago
sorry, just kidding
7 years ago
or AM i?
7 years ago
O.o
7 years ago
comment count: 13,362
7 years ago
thats like counting turds no?
7 years ago
Seems like for a stupid human trick, it got lots of hits though. More than most lately.
7 years ago
"whooo could imagine?...."
7 years ago
hits? no

comments? yes
7 years ago
Sweet nice guns
6 years ago
nice jesus patrol shirt as well
5 years ago
Holy shit.. what a redneck queer!!
9 months ago
does your t-shirt say "Jesus patrol"?
9 months ago
recover password
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