points: 2

Bacon is good for me

Generic American child. Fuck you all.

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by Theck4

submitted August 29th 2009

114 comments
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muchoworthytr_willk
TheAllMightyToaster
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comments (114)
Typical redneck marshmallow kid.
Just give him a deep-fried mayonnaise ball and he'll be happy.
8 years ago
It's archive footage of Dr.Phil
8 years ago
i would eat a deep fried mayo ball
8 years ago
who the fuck wouldn't eat a deep fried mayo ball...
8 years ago
Sounds fucking repulsive
8 years ago
how do you get mayonaise to stay in a ball
8 years ago
lard
8 years ago
Yummy....sounds, erm, putrid?
8 years ago
You drop it from a nice hight into the deep fat fryer, fries.

Mayo is an emulsion, a semi liquid, basically. And liquids fall spherically, not 'tear' shaped as people assume, simply 'cause they draw raindrops like that as kids.

There you have deep fried mayo balls.
8 years ago
^ That's how they make ball bearings.
8 years ago
^ Apart from they drop molten metal, not mayo. They also drop it into water, not hot oil.
8 years ago
Thank you, Cliff Claven.
8 years ago
You just spout off common knowledge like its sudden scientific breakthrough. Anyone who has ever had Dippin Dots knows that shit.
8 years ago
Dippin what?
8 years ago
About 30 minutes ago Irish thought "Ahhhhhh so that's how they make Dippin Dots...wow"

8 years ago
The acrostic was epic.
8 years ago
Thank you sir
8 years ago
Meh.
8 years ago
LOL oranje

Anyway, it sounds like a scottish dish to me.
8 years ago
I wonder if I'm too tall to dropkick this fucker.

(I know I'll have five little piggy fucks just like him when I start spawning offspring.)
8 years ago
so don't
8 years ago
I couldn't deny the world such opportunity for ridicule, now, could I?
8 years ago
child rearing is not easy
8 years ago
Never said it was, but with it comes all the wonderful opportunities for abuse, neglect, and other such crimes that so many parents seem to get away with these days. Only because there are so many goddamn kids to begin with.
8 years ago
slapping a kid upside the head for being a dipshit is quite satisfying
8 years ago
can i borrow your kid jamiee?
8 years ago
typical american child?
8 years ago
bitte luda, bitte....VERRECK IN DER HÖLLE,
KÖLSCHES STÜCK SCHEISSE!!!!
8 years ago
he i coulda done with her gitting rid of the junk food but i would draw the line at the bacon havin to go also you cant have a good breakfast with out bacon to go with ya eggs over easy ...lol
8 years ago
Punctuation isn't your friend.
8 years ago
you tell 'em kid
8 years ago
"... she's the queen and we're the sorry people."

AHAHAHAHA
8 years ago
STORY people. its much funnier and correct that way.
8 years ago
God bless the queen.
8 years ago
You hear that, motherfuckers!
8 years ago
send her victorious..... P.S i need that kid in my life... mainly so i can take bacon away from him on a daily basis
8 years ago
I'd cook it first and then throw it away
8 years ago
and now i'm expected to believe that all this is unscripted and depicting "real life"?hells yeah, cuz tons of kids talk like that and use words like "sarcastic". the writers on these shows arent even trying to pass it of as real anymore are they? its just tv drama with lower production values....
8 years ago
If you think all kids in America are dumber than that, then you're a very sad product of your environment.
8 years ago
If theres one thing the internet has taught me it's that americans are stupid , fat and gay
8 years ago
Mainly gay
8 years ago
Judging from the accent, the house, and the view in the driveway, this kid is obviously from a rural town in the south. Which basically says it all. If you think all Americans are like this you're apparently not very educated (or well-traveled).
8 years ago
uhm guys, i wanted to bash on reality tv, but if you wanna have the 1000th "duh, murrikans are stupid, duh" discussion go right ahead....
8 years ago
I'd like to see anyone go to "a rural town in the south" and talk shit about America.
8 years ago
Stfu...been there, done that.
8 years ago
Just mock American foreign policy, government corruption & the ever increasing debt. They wouldn't have a fucking clue what you were talking about.
8 years ago
True story...when I was livin in da South (during the 2004 election), this moron kept arguing with me how he was a 'Democrat, and his father was a Democrat, and his father before that'...he meant 'Republican'.
8 years ago
hahaha

What is it with their obsession with aligning themselves with either political party, which, lets face it, don't actually give a fuck about them. We really don't have people seeking a sense of identity by slapping cunt face Camerons spastic tree sticker, or cyclops' ZANU-Labour red rose on their car.
8 years ago
Well, a few...
8 years ago
Rural towns in the south should be used for nucleur bomb testing.
8 years ago
fuck off..bashing an entire region is ignorant, Hank. You know that.
8 years ago
Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence. James Madison was the father of the Constitution and George Mason was the author of the Bill of Rights. John Marshall, Chief Justice of the United States Supreme Court. George Washington, we all know what he did. All were Southerners. Do you like jazz, Hank? Because Dizzie Gillespie and Louie Armstrong are both southerners. Did you like Bill Clinton and do you think Jimmy Carter is a great man? Both are southerners. Shall I continue?
8 years ago
Please do. I'm having trouble falling asleep.
8 years ago
you don't always have to act like an ass, Hank
8 years ago
well obiously, he does, its his sole pleasure in life since his dick got limp forever back in '88.
8 years ago
I yam what I yam, sweet potato.
8 years ago
Don't you worry about my cock, Baygull, it's harder then diamond.
8 years ago
I wouldn't worry, jamiee.

We're just rap/poem battling.
I don't think Hank is upto it though.
Never mind though, the practice will do him well.
8 years ago
and almost three carat heavy, right???
8 years ago
other southerners I love are Woodie Guthrie, Samuel Clemons, William Faulkner, Martin Luther King
8 years ago
Admit it, Hank, the south isn't all bad
8 years ago
You can't bash an entire region
8 years ago
^Yes, that would be wrong.
8 years ago
jamiee, you seem way to educated to be on here...or to be on dik for that matter...
8 years ago
There are people on here way smarter than I am...Hank and OJ are both smarter than I am in a lot of ways
8 years ago
and you're too humble, too!!
8 years ago
While you're down there kissing her ass, Baygull, why you give Dik's balls a light caress?
8 years ago
OJ, your rhymes are rap pollution. You should cut back on your emissions.
8 years ago
hank, its called "being nice",
you should try it sometime.
and again , wheres the insult in "baygull"?
im no native english speaker so please, explain!
8 years ago
It's not an insult. It's from a joke.

What would you call a seagull that flies over the bay?

A baygull. (It sounds like bagel.)
8 years ago
The southwest is ok.
8 years ago
oh, i love those!
friend of mine has a british joke book,
full with stupid jokes like that!

whats grey, weighs four tons and lives in california?

an l.a.-phant, buahahahaha!!!
8 years ago
I use these a lot.

http://iteslj.org/c/jokes-riddles.html
8 years ago
great site, thanks!
you use those in class or what?
8 years ago
Yes, in class.
8 years ago
I like to do lots of jokes, riddles, games, wordplay, etc...It's too boring otherwise.
8 years ago
so the little jappies you unleash on the world are funny because of their accent AND because of the great pun based humour you tought them, good work there, buddy!!
8 years ago
my english teacher often used limericks, and many many times he stood there mumbling:
"hum, cant use that one, its too dirty, what about...uhm, no....maybe the one with nantucket...uhm, no...OKAY LISETN UP CLASS:
THERE ONCE WAS A LADY IN RIGA...."
8 years ago
Hank, we really need to discuss that joke.
8 years ago
No, we really don't.
8 years ago
Cruel, you dumbfuck, Tennessee isn't "The South".
8 years ago
The south wont rise again
8 years ago
not to mention the "Turtle man"
8 years ago
apologies to everyone...
but i would just beat this kid senseless
8 years ago
why don't we beat children anymore? These little cocksuckers need an ass whooping.
8 years ago
God says its ok.
8 years ago
See what I mean about these kind of people. These mutants grow up as such assholes and they are lazy too.
8 years ago
If I was that little kid, I would ask the black woman if I could smell her panties before she takes a shower. That is the kind of sick fuck I am.
8 years ago
If you were that little kid you would've begged her to fuck you with a strap on.
8 years ago
No, not really,that is something you did with your MUM a while back.
8 years ago
Cue Bicho:

"Yo mama...fuck me up the ass baby! Please? Hello? Hell.....OWWWWWW!!!!"
8 years ago
Another brilliant Republican Child.
8 years ago
How can that fat fucker not remind you of Ted Kennedy?
8 years ago
More like Rush Limbaugh, fat pig fucker
8 years ago
It's not polite to joke about people that didn't recently die.
8 years ago
I'm not joking
8 years ago
so dik is actually going to move to the USA, jaimee?...wow
8 years ago
I would drown that little fucker in the river, then it a bacon cheeseburger
8 years ago
*eat
8 years ago
*reply
8 years ago
*fail
8 years ago
What fucking state do children become grumpy old men?
8 years ago
Georgia.
8 years ago
I'm going there with a bag of weed and laugh till I die.
8 years ago
RolandofGilead's long lost son
8 years ago
im sure this kid isnt nearly as fat as the lot in here
8 years ago
what's the name of this show?
8 years ago
i love him
8 years ago
Sexually or like you love a child of your own ?
8 years ago
Dik is a stepfather, I don't think he has a kid of his own.
8 years ago
That's because he's impotent from all the chemicals he used to put in his body during the 60s and 70s.

Dirty hippy.
8 years ago
dame niggers stealin Bacon and what not
8 years ago
i saw this clip on the soup, hes a funny little shit, needs his own show.
8 years ago
fake!
8 years ago
recover password
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