points: 16

Handheld Printer

Eat your pacemaker out Nix

featuredcool

by Jones

submitted September 1st 2017

92 comments
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comments (92)
Somehow this doesn't seem as fun as the summer I spent painting slab numbers on steel just off the casting line. Mmmmm...

* JamesTKirk faps to burning paint smells. *
3 weeks ago
It's only smellz.
3 weeks ago
Listen, I could write numbers with a six foot paint stick better than anyone!
3 weeks ago
*suck
*6 in dick
*black
3 weeks ago
BUSTED
3 weeks ago
Haha
3 weeks ago
Never *correct an admiral.
3 weeks ago
*Rear Admiral
3 weeks ago
The other day I found out where the term "poop deck" came from. Turns out that it has nothing to do with poop.
3 weeks ago
Why are you always focused on my rear? I'm gonna call the fuckin cops.
3 weeks ago
He likes Jim's butt and he cannot lie.
3 weeks ago
It's concerning. The gay dead presidents.
3 weeks ago
Call the cops.... IDGAF
3 weeks ago
Haha, that's what you said last time, you fuckin drunk zeek-wannabe.
3 weeks ago
I'm not drunk.... i missed my last "medication time"
3 weeks ago
It's a holiday weekend, when does zeek report for duty here anyway?
3 weeks ago
You'll be alright. Go play with some hot soldering irons.
3 weeks ago
Just the tip.....
3 weeks ago
MUST HAVE!!!!!!
3 weeks ago
Graffiti technology has come a long way
3 weeks ago
I would tag everything!!!
3 weeks ago
Like you're gonna pay the fuckin postage to get this.
3 weeks ago
This could be a dangerous weapon in the hands of an ex wife or girlfriend, unfortunately.
3 weeks ago
I pay shipping to buy things..... i short pay when shipping out
3 weeks ago
Nixon would have something like:

"I fucked the USPS. I'm a stamp whore!"
3 weeks ago
FACT
3 weeks ago
He'd use the printer to write "YOU FUCK!!!" on all his shipments.
3 weeks ago
And everything else for that matter
3 weeks ago
https://i.imgur.com/eBE21mm.jpg
3 weeks ago
How steady must your hand be?
My hands are almost Parkinsons level I don't really think I could use this
3 weeks ago
Looked to me like there were guide rollers on the end, Sin.
3 weeks ago
Steady cam technology FTW
3 weeks ago
Yeah I rewatched i looks like you're right. Right now we use stencils when we need to make official markings. I dont see us getting this anytime soon though :(
3 weeks ago
it*
3 weeks ago
I would totally use this to print "GTO" all over Cap'n Fuck's '69 LeMans
3 weeks ago
* JamesTKirk orders a Skittles car wrap for PresidentFucks 86 Dodge Horizon. *
3 weeks ago
Well played, you Fuck
3 weeks ago
"Deuce"
3 weeks ago
* NixonsGhost leverages free Skittles wrap into advertising income *
3 weeks ago
Advantage, Nixon
3 weeks ago
TADA!!!!!
3 weeks ago
um...
3 weeks ago
...mazing
2 weeks ago
settle down
2 weeks ago
He's old, let him be excited about this one thing, he doesn't get very excited very often anymore.
* Sinaitis scampers *
2 weeks ago
dude, he's only approaching 42...
2 weeks ago
* NixonsGhost swings cane violently at possum *
2 weeks ago
43?
2 weeks ago
That's kinda part of the joke poss.
Like he thinks he's super old so you gotta fuck with him about it.
* Sinaitis unscampers *
2 weeks ago
been trying to nail down his real age for a while- all signs point to late 30s early 40s
2 weeks ago
Shut your mouth!!!!
2 weeks ago
I eat a lot of Asian women to look this young
2 weeks ago
hard to tell you never know with drug abuse and all...just look at punky dude's only 15 years old, but the drugs aged him excessively.
2 weeks ago
eating people is the secret to eternal youth? who would've thunk?
2 weeks ago
* possum sends nixon some of his old grey hairs that just falled out to piss me off *
2 weeks ago
THEY ARE LONG AND WISPY!!!!!
2 weeks ago
Gross
2 weeks ago
ps
pps
penis
they're also from his balls
2 weeks ago
just you wait
2 weeks ago
okay, i know this is TMI territory, but i have almost no body hair these days
2 weeks ago
It's going to your head and inside your nose & ears. Fact.
2 weeks ago
http://i.imgur.com/OtYT5uf.gif
2 weeks ago
And that was the wrong gif. Meant to use this one:http://i.imgur.com/KajI9X9.gif
2 weeks ago
that would splain lots, thanks
2 weeks ago
*it's a series of tubes!!!!!!!
2 weeks ago
There's not a damn thing wrong with havin' a couple of grandpa hairs.

http://muchosucko.com/122530/GREY
2 weeks ago
I only said your name once and I wasn't looking in a mirror. I thought you're suppose to say it 3 times while looking in a mirror.
I'm out broseph 8)
2 weeks ago
* PunkyBruiser gets back on his Crown RM *
2 weeks ago
Crown RM is what he calls his urethral stimulator.
2 weeks ago
my beard now has opposing continents/patches...some white, some red, some marmont colored...
2 weeks ago
* possum invades Irkutsk *
2 weeks ago
It's nice there this time of year.
2 weeks ago
*me posscans memorabilia for future use
2 weeks ago
good plan, mr 40-something
2 weeks ago
* Mako invades Yakutsk *
2 weeks ago
meh - hairy russian chicks an gooks..go for it
2 weeks ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNfb1X1awL8
2 weeks ago
Also, the hot Russian chick in the vid I posted yesterday is from there.
2 weeks ago
* Jones waits for possum to get a handheld scanner *
2 weeks ago
Nut sack scans for everyone!!!!!
2 weeks ago
His arms aren't long enough to scan them in their entirety :/
2 weeks ago
* Jones blows cuntscab and usedtampon some kisses *
2 weeks ago
He barely uses the scanner he already has, dog.
2 weeks ago
Thats because Nix is a shitty engineer who failed when helping him fix it
2 weeks ago
Don't blame me.... he never shipped it
2 weeks ago
*it's on his end
2 weeks ago
What's on his end? Skimmed milk?
2 weeks ago
Shame and fear
2 weeks ago
rubber/glue
2 weeks ago
When do ee get chilli scans?!?!?!
2 weeks ago
eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
2 weeks ago
Every single fucking time someone makes me a coffee drink or a burrito I ask myself: why isn't a machine doing this? Machines replacing humans for work will be a good thing for us all. I think capitalism will still exist for a while, but a universal basic income may be necessary in the next 50 years.
2 weeks ago
recover password
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