points: -1

Dane Cook on Masterbation and Mario Bro's

Dane Cook doing a comedy routine on masterbation and the different types of masterbation men do infront of woman and alone. Funny as hell

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by Caichee

submitted October 5th 2006

34 comments
what do you think? let everyone know!
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muchoworthynot muchoworthyjrob2020
comments (34)
Jesus, if everyone got paid that kinda money for discussing their fapping habits in front of thousands of strangers, you guys could afford to move outta your parents basements
11 years ago
Bush getting re-elected was the first sign of the apocalypse...this guy being revered as actually being funny is the second...the end is near!!!!
11 years ago
Dane Cook....really not that funny
11 years ago
Dane Cook.... um .. yes he is funny.
11 years ago
He says "we" as if he's not refering to himself... it is kinda funny, actually, esp. if you think to yourself that's probably what he does to himself anyway.
11 years ago
Well I wouldn't go as far to say that dane cook isn't funny, most of his stuff really isn't all that bad, it's just how he goes about presenting his skits. They all have that -ya kinda had to be there - feel to them.

Like if you've never seen or heard him do a specific skit and you have somone else trying to recite it or tell you about it, it won't make any fucking sense unless the person telling you is extreamly good with imitations.
11 years ago
What's this magic career point that people cross where not matter what random shit they talk about people cheer like morons. "I'm collectin coins in my basement..." YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY! SO FUNNY! Uhhhhhhh! Gretzkeeeeeeeeeee!
11 years ago
I'm sorry guys, call me old, call me unhip, I just don't get him. I have never found him funny at all. In fact, I got total douchechills while I was watcing this. And the fact that there was such a grandiose presentation for such a jerk off made it worse.
11 years ago
Both my roommates love this guy, and I can't fucking stand him. Seriously, I don't want to watch you talk about how you masturbate with full motions. And he acts like god's gift to women, anyone with an ego that large bothers me. Give me Bill Hicks or Denis Leary (yes I am aware of the controversy over the two) any day.
11 years ago
I fucking hate Dane Cook. I gave this SOB a chance after the first time I heard a stand up routine from him. I thought he was super funny then, but after watching all of his specials, he just FUCKING SUCKS! He's the kind of comedians only white college frat boys understand and love.

11 years ago
He sucks..I dont fucking know how people laugh at his weak as jokes..
11 years ago
It is debatable that Dane Cook may have ripped off some of Louis CK's material. Judge for yourself:

http://www.redban.com/audio/danesteals.mp3
11 years ago
Well it sounds like Cook definately stole the ideas, but used own filler for the jokes... I guess its still pretty safe say Ck got ripped off.
11 years ago
used his own*
11 years ago
Not particularly funny. Sure, jerking off is a funny premise but there's gotta be an actual joke somewhere in the mix.
11 years ago
DANE COOK OWNS

If you dont get it then you have a very limited sense of humor and I pity you.

P.S In the world of comics, adapting other comedians concepts is quite common, but nobody here ever goes to a "Comedy Club" but just sits at home eating TV dinners and considers themselves to be a top notch critic. I suggest The Laugh Factory or Improv in LA for any Cali residents that want to try educating themselves outside of the internet for opinions on comedy. ouchies
11 years ago
^So we don't find it funny so WE must have a bad sense of humor??!?!!? WE must ALL have bad taste??!!!? So WE are the idiots, WE are the ones who don't know whats humorous, WE are the assholes, not you?!?!!? Cause YOU and 1 other person liked it!!?

douchebag
11 years ago
s0nn3 u fucking dumb prick
11 years ago
the best comedians are victor borga and rodney dangerfield. This guy is an asswipe compared to them.
11 years ago
Eddie Izzard.
11 years ago
these guys all need a whaaaaaambulance.
he's more talented than you and makes more money than you ever will.
jealousy is funny on the internet.
wwwwwwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
11 years ago
Wow, after reading all the comments, I was so happy to know I'm not the only person in the US who doesn't think this guy is funny. He's really not. He tells stories that have a lot of build up, and then a very weak punchline. His comedy is more in his physical presentation I guess but even then, he's not funny. If you want to hear some good comedy, check out David Cross. I heard him for the first time the other day and he's hilarious.
11 years ago
eh... he has some ok bits... but hes by no means the best comic out there right now... he for some strange reason is one of the most popular... thats how it goes tho... but i mean if you think the guys funny there is nothing wrong with that.. just like if you don't think hes funny.. its your choice :).... trying to bash someone based on what they like and don't like is really.... really..... pointless :P
11 years ago
list of ppl to see besides dane cook:

louis ck (also had an hbo show)
rodney dangerfield
george carlin
mitch hedberg
victor borga
david cross (mr show stuff too)
richard pryor
lenny bruce
pablo francisco
sklar bros
david lynch
eddie izzard
eddie murphy (delirious special*)
bill hicks
denis leary

ADD TO THE LIST
instead of bitching youtube these guys and actually laugh
11 years ago
oh and patton oswald
11 years ago
and sam kinison (sp)
11 years ago
DieterR, damn right, that cat is funny as hell. Cake or death?
11 years ago
George Carlin, I bow down to his majesty.
11 years ago
^I saw a Carlin show on TV the other day and he looked he was already dead!
11 years ago
Cake or Death is a classic.

I also loved the whole 'Englebert Humperdink being named' routine.
He's dead, you know...
11 years ago
Carlin is old as the hills. Well now that I know how all you guys feel about him I guess it's time to post MY 2 cents...I think the guy's hilarious. If you can't laugh at yourselves (assuming all you guys jerk it..which I'd be naive to think you don't) then who can you laugh at?
11 years ago
Still funny... thanks children
11 years ago
Check this out fucken dolts Courtesy of MSNBC

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/13345612/#storyContinued

Some 18,000 pumped fans crowd into Boston's TD Banknorth Garden on a recent evening, hoarse and sweaty and impatient. For half an hour they chant, over and over, "We want Dane!" Some have paid brokers $500 to be here. When Dane Cook finally takes the stage, the place erupts in a deafening roar.

It is a rock star's welcome — for a stand-up comic. Cook is 34, trim, hot-looking and one of the hottest new comedians around. Retaliation, his latest (and second) album, debuted at No. 4 on the Billboard music charts, the highest any comic has hit since Steve Martin in 1978.
11 years ago
>Dane cook
>funny
pick one
5 years ago
recover password
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