points: 12

in remembrance of Captain Bertram Aloysius (Al) Paddletail

With a heavyheart, I wish my final farewells to a truly angry, territorial, battlescared yet respected one eyed beaver we at the Hpuston lakeside security detail have named Al. Al has always been a resident of these waters well before the development of these office towers that surrounds his home. Late at night while on security I would hear a nearby hiss, a bubble or two popping closeby then a horrific splash to warn away anybody that walked too close to HIS lake. Some months ago, a group of drunken fishermen didn't take the ferocious rodents warnings lightly. One unfortunate drunk decided to investigate the strange noises only to have two of his toes bitten clean through his Converses. This morning, news filled the office as a friend of a coworker went fishing on our property and shot dead a charging one eyed beaver. Rest peacefully you bitter, angry little asshole rodent. We will protect your damn, home in your absence.

featuredstupid

by L0RD_QU3S0

submitted February 26th 2017

17 comments
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in remembrance of Captain Bertram Aloysius (Al) Paddletail
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comments (17)
wtf
7 months ago
is this facebook ?
7 months ago
Fries-book
7 months ago
= kindle
7 months ago
fuck you punky....
7 months ago
Have some respect people. Bill Paxton just passed away
7 months ago
Wtf!!!!
7 months ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2ycDWywGls&app=desktop
7 months ago
* NixonsGhost sads *
7 months ago
what does this thread have to do with Bill Paxton
7 months ago
I laughed, then felt bad.
7 months ago
dam, what a shame
7 months ago
7 months ago
are queso and freshie related?
7 months ago
Such a shoppable face
7 months ago
*punchable
7 months ago
recover password
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