points: 28

Point Blank Turd Flinging

Dog shit catapult. Or Slingshot for you murk'ns

featuredgross

by makodragon

submitted February 2nd 2017

177 comments
what do you think? let everyone know!
tagged:
comments (177)
I like your tattoo mako
1 year ago
don't you just wanna motorboat my titties?
1 year ago
been there, done that
1 year ago
The FUCK is wrong with people?????
1 year ago
Don't insult the olde English ritual of self-turd-flinging
1 year ago
I was in my mates house before and we had been sessioning all night, he did a massive shit that wouldn't go down the bog, so he got a small shovel for the fire took, out the shit and lobbed it a few gardens down, imagine what the woman in that house was thinking when she went to hang out the washing and there is a massive human shit in her back garden, in a high walled area, she knew somebody was flinging shit.
1 year ago
lol, yeah... that's the first solution I think of when there's a massive turd blocking the toilet... "I'll dig it out and fling it!"
1 year ago
If you don't have a plunger, straighten out a wire hanger and break it up using that.
1 year ago
my mate told me his mother advised him to pour hot water down the toilet
1 year ago
I discovered after around 27 years that is you use a toilet brush to just force the shit down, it flows away no problems. But try explaining that to someone that's been up all night popping E's. The best logic at that time is to throw it into your neighbors garden.
1 year ago
I've heard that helps too, MD.
1 year ago
Only here could there possibly be multiple poo elimination suggestions.
1 year ago
Hey, they're helpful household hints...brought to you by the weirdos at Muchosucko.com
1 year ago
When i was in hospital before i didn't shit for eight days because of all the meds they were giving me, so i was eating non stop, getting kfc dropped in, and everybody coming to see me with boxes of chocolates and stuff. That was all well and good until i had to shit. I was trying to control the yelps, and i was in a public ward with 6 other people. I clogged the toilet, and the nurse had to call up somebody to unblock my shit. It was awesome.
1 year ago
When I had kidney stones they were giving me Dilaudid every four hours. When I finally did poop after a week, it was the consistency of a meteorite.
1 year ago
Yea, shit building up in the system isn't good, even if for the lads.
1 year ago
Yeah, but when you finally do shit your pants for the lads, it's fucking epic.
1 year ago
Yea. The last time I did I was on a golf course. Fun times.
1 year ago
When poop gives you trouble, chow it down and pass it double.
1 year ago
Last time I did it, I was 14, and it was Christmas Eve. That's why I say never trust a fart if you can help it.
1 year ago
I remeber you saying that, but i don't think we were even using shit your pants for the lads at that stage. You basically just shat your pants for no reason.
1 year ago
By the way, a water bottle can be used as a "jet flush" device.....just saying. Masterful when in a hotel room and you don't want to call maintenance because you fucked up the toilet.
1 year ago
I think if I had to shit on a golf course, I'd just go in the woods and wipe with my golf towel. They're cheap enough to replace.
1 year ago
Hahaha, Kurupt.
1 year ago
That comment was for kirk by the way, i didn't think you were all going to butt in with different pants shitting stories.
1 year ago
Shark, emergency situation and it was a links course....no woods.
1 year ago
Damn, thats just bad luck, Jim.
1 year ago
Ya, I almost made it to the Porto-potty. I even ditched my fucking clubs and ran for it.
1 year ago
Kirk, you in the US this weekend? I'm flying out to Manhattan tomorrow...gonna see The Phantom Of The Opera at the Majestic Theater on Saturday after dinner at Nobu.
1 year ago
Nice! Enjoy that.

No, I catch an 11am to Singapore, again.
1 year ago
This thread is reserved for shitting and pants only.
1 year ago
* NixonsGhost eats a bottle of imodium AD and waits for the results and hopefully a competitive story *
1 year ago
I'm still laughing about the pants shitting for no reason comment.
1 year ago
You could shit through the eye of a needle, and film it.
1 year ago
Poop stories are always a good read.
1 year ago
I'm thinking I might need to poop on my flight tomorrow.
1 year ago
I should be okay. I just don't know ceviche is gonna sit in my stomach on Saturday.
1 year ago
*how ceviche
1 year ago
You'll be fine. The vinegar essentially cooks the fish.
1 year ago
Yeah, that's true.
1 year ago
Sit next to the poshest woman on the plane kirk, and start telling her all about shitting your pants for the lads, then just let it out when you experience a poctet of turbulance, so you are bouncing around on the shit and it's wafting around the aircraft. That should get the word out, that shitting your pants for the lads is for winners.
1 year ago
Shit smells are the worst on an aircraft. You're in this pressurized metal tube and the smell just doesn't dissipate.
1 year ago
For winners...... hahahahahahaha
1 year ago
GOLD!!!!!
1 year ago
Dude. You are talking to a guy that took 2 fucking Air India flights a couple weeks ago. Never again.
1 year ago
I almost shit my pants to *improve* things on those flights.
1 year ago
HALA HALA!
1 year ago
Mako you know a lot about the science of farts.
1 year ago
I do dabble in Fartology a bit.
1 year ago
Thank the gods, or id still not know what a stuck fart was.
1 year ago
That was an awesome thread, i'm glad we can talk so freely about shit.
1 year ago
Sharing poop is a wonderful past time.
1 year ago
I was getting into a bit of a habit of almost shitting my pants there about 4 years ago, but i was on the spirits pretty heavy at that stage. Had to shit behind a car one night at around 3am, couldn't hold it. Took off a sock to wipe my arse, and away i went.
1 year ago

JamesTKirk
I'm thinking I might need to poop on my flight tomorrow.
47 minutes agoreport spam | unlike | stfu

Hahaha....I make it a habit to try and take a stinking dump while flying. I also snore like a motherfucker so napping is essential.
1 year ago
You FUCK!!!!!
1 year ago
* NixonsGhost books grethound from now on *
1 year ago
Guaranteed if you take a greyhound, some dirty bastard is already after shitting his pants for the lads on it.
1 year ago
I figure if one of the motherfuckers on the plane is going to spread their filthy germs to me I am going to in the very least make them smell my shit and rage cringe at my extremely loud snoring.
1 year ago
Shitting your pants for the lads is a draining but soothing experience mag, you should have no problem drifting off to sleep after it.
1 year ago
I could sleep on a picket fence.
1 year ago
When i fly and sit next to people that snore or are obnoxious..... i always make sure to accidentally spill my drink on them..... accidentally
1 year ago
Problem solved
1 year ago
YOU FUCK!
1 year ago
It was totally that air pocket and turbulence
1 year ago
You go out of your way to find an annoying person and then burn the fuck out of them with hot coffee, that's fairly fucking weird, nix.
1 year ago
They have it coming
1 year ago
A day in the life of a sociopath.
1 year ago
*greedy sociopath
1 year ago
I'm usually drinking heavily on a plane because I dislike flying, so I'm not about to waste alcohol by spilling it on someone.
1 year ago
Kurupt is correct.... i always get a coffee..... and then wait.
1 year ago
It either burns them or stains their shit...... or both.
1 year ago
The exception is kids..... they get water.
1 year ago
You should fly first class so that you don't encounter those problems.
1 year ago
This is way funner
1 year ago
I'd fly on private jets of i could get me some of kurupt's dart money
1 year ago
I fling my shit into coach from first class.
1 year ago
We're taking a Learjet 60 to NYC this weekend. Buffalo airport has a few private airlines that have Lears and a few Gulfstreams, so I'm sure you could find a nice aircraft in Denver.
1 year ago
Talking about dart money. I was talking to the promoter of the Gary Anderson night, he works in the pharmacy where i get my prescription. He said he charged six grand for the night, plus his flights, accommodation, food, drink a round of golf was all inclusive. He did four shows over here in 5 day and got six grand a touch that's twenty four grand for a weeks work. The jammy cunt.
1 year ago
I need to get me some of that dart loot
1 year ago
Better get practicing. Iv'e been playing almost every day for the past ten years, and some days you play good ad other days you play shit. It's one of the hardest games to be consistent at, i think the pros are just born with it.
1 year ago
Kurupt, what's a ps4 controller worth to you.... including shipping?
1 year ago
How much is shipping?
1 year ago
Probably $10 or $15
1 year ago
Maybe less
1 year ago
I need a baseline as i look for broken shit
1 year ago
And what kinda price are the broken controllers
1 year ago
I been seeing $20 to $30 per controller
1 year ago
So say $40 for the controller and shipping, then if you need to buy any parts and labor. It's probably not worth my while. I could find a second hand one for sale in Ireland and maybe get it for 40 or 50 realistically.
1 year ago
Whatever you do, don't buy one on ebay for 20 bucks.
1 year ago
My thoughts exactly..... on both counts
1 year ago
My labor costs would dip into your dart loot to the tune of $250 an hour
1 year ago
And that's the friend discounted rate
1 year ago
Yeah, i got a ps3 blue controller from china for 20 a couple of years back, had nothing but problems with it, wouldn't charge properly, kept turning off, vibration would come and go, a pain in the fucking hole basically.
1 year ago
Nah fuck that, and at the speed you tend to work, i would end up owing you thousands.
1 year ago
I can fix that blue controller if you want.....
1 year ago
Hahahaha
1 year ago
I gave it to my cousin along with the bluetooth headset and a few games, they were no good to me anymore after the ps3 crashed.
1 year ago
I can fix that too.....
1 year ago
I gave it into the pawn shop and told them i was going to buy it back. I did it so often they didn't even check it, so i got 70 towards the ps4 from that. Suckers.
1 year ago
Anyway, stop telling me that you can fix shit for me, we've established that it pointless for you to do work for me, mainly because you are a hungry bastard that charges 250 an hour, fried rate my hole.
1 year ago
You FUCK!!!!!!
1 year ago
Only cause i know your good for it with all that dart loot you're making.
1 year ago
They made plenty money off me over the few years, if you go 70 off them you had to pay 95 to get it back, i did it a load of times, at 25 a time, they made a lot more than 70 off me.
1 year ago
Dart loot, what? The last time i won money at darts was before Christmas, and that was on 30
1 year ago
^only
1 year ago
Dude... that's 10 minutes of work. You're off to a good start
1 year ago
Nix, why don't you sharpen your cane and enter the Great American Rocky Mountain Jart-off?
1 year ago
Hmmmmmmmmm
1 year ago
* ClaudeBallz alerts DIA *
1 year ago
It was mixed doubles nix, it started at 9pm and didn't finish until around 12.30, i drank around 8 pints in that time at 4.50 each, so i was actually down money.
1 year ago
Just found a glacier white ps4 controller on eBay, unopened for 47 euro in Ireland and 5.50 postage and packaging. That's not bad.
1 year ago
Would you say this is one of the dodgy ones nix? http://www.ebay.ie/itm/New-Offical-Bluetooth-Wireless-Controller-Gamepad-For-PS4-/132035105908?hash=item1ebde7d474%3Ag%3AEXAAAOSwo4pYUkmx
1 year ago
I'd risk it. 2 year warranty. You can always complain and get your money back.
1 year ago
PS.... I will likely get a new lathe in March. When i do i can manufacture my own lawn darts.
1 year ago
Fuck that was a long time waiting for a reply, lucky for you i have nothing better to be doing, and am wired out of my head
1 year ago
For legit competition, of course
1 year ago
I was busy working a TV repair deal.
1 year ago
Should be a quick $120 profit
1 year ago
I got a loan of fallout 4, spent a bit of time playing it, i can't get into it at all not my kinda game. Did you ever play any of them on ps2
1 year ago
First PS4 should be here next week..... will be interesting to see if its a good deal or not
1 year ago
Fallout, nope. I was more into tomb raider and gran torismo
1 year ago
When you get the ps4 sign up for your 2 weeks free ps plus membership. I activated it the other day, i should still have a few days on it by the time you get yours.
1 year ago
Oh, and socom....... lots of socom
1 year ago
Assumimg i can fix it in time
1 year ago
I'm still trying to track down some schematics
1 year ago
If it's just a power issue i'm sure it something handy, the same with the one turning off after a few mins, that was happening to my ps3 as well, i just reset factory setting, and then download the update files via USB, and it was working again perfect;y.
1 year ago
Perhaps..... my fear is a bad capacitor on the power supply or worse. Having the schematics helps me understand how it all comes together and whete to start troubleshooting.
1 year ago
Baby don't fear the capacitors.
1 year ago
I may just fix 'em and sell 'em for more cash
1 year ago
You sicken my shit, i hate hungry people. I hope you are joking about being that tight of a cunt.
1 year ago
Fix a few broken ones.... make some cash..... buy a new one..... badically costs me nothing
1 year ago
You are badically to the bone.
1 year ago
Haha
1 year ago
May have to sub a repair video or two
1 year ago
I read back over this thread around five times when you were gone, it's definitely one of the funniest ones i remember in a long time, and no handicappers jumped in to ruin it.
1 year ago
It's in my top 10 for sure
1 year ago
I think the "shitting your pants is for winners" put it over thd top for me
1 year ago
That and dart loot.....
1 year ago
Haha
1 year ago
Any plans for the weekend, bar being a winner of course.
1 year ago
I need to prep my shop this weekend. I have a new endmill coming on saturday.
1 year ago
That and prep the ps4 repair table
1 year ago
I assume you will be drinkig and chucking darts.....
1 year ago
I'm sure i will be chucking darts, not too sure about the drinking. Have too many bills this week. Probably just a few smokes and a few games of spears.
1 year ago
You should get a side gig.... fix electronics.... get extra cash
1 year ago
I did serve two years as an apprentice electrician, but i should have went to to electronic engineering, that was always what i really wanted to do, then i could be making hats of money and being a real tight fucker, just like you.
1 year ago
Never too late.....
1 year ago
It's a lot of training to do again, i'm sure the whole curriculum is after changing by now, it was almost fifteen years ago when i did it first. It would be four or five years on shit money.
1 year ago
This fag is making a name for himself. Firecrackers, paintballs, now shit in the face. I guarantee he has been on this site either as a member or guest.
1 year ago
Drumrave ?
1 year ago
Impossible.
1 year ago
*drumpossible
1 year ago
Fake. He's just thinking about too many chicken tenders.
1 year ago
DusteraBruiser
1 year ago
Shut your fuckin' dick sucker, faggot.
1 year ago
* NixonsGhost throws Kurupt's darts at Punky *
1 year ago
Here Nix use the heavier set.
1 year ago
Like I said...
1 year ago
Nix Choose which weapons you want to throw at punky. http://imgur.com/sc2I9rC
1 year ago
Any ideas why the picture didn't show up, i copied and pasted the image link?
1 year ago
You have to right click on it and do view image..... paste that link of just the picture
1 year ago
http://i.imgur.com/sc2I9rC.jpg
1 year ago
Nice one nix.
1 year ago
The ones on the right I've been using for around ten years, but the points got completely blunt and the were bouncing out all the time, i got them re-pointed, but the points he used are massive, and they have changed the whole flight of the dart.
1 year ago
I'll take the three on the right. I don't need that fancy stuff.....
1 year ago
Those are my weapons, i will have to pay to get the re-pointed again, this time i'll buy in the points myself.
1 year ago
Your darts are sexy, KUR.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sNdUeC63ssY
1 year ago
They are, i give them a light spanking before each game
1 year ago
Epic butt smacks. Throw those mother fuckers at the bullseye.


https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gwBjZLzY7Eo
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gwBjZLzY7Eo
1 year ago
His body is like a whole new world globe. What a useless fat fuck. Fat on, you waste of life, FAT ON.
1 year ago
Get your ear muffs punkster.....
1 year ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqCotgdEZsk
1 year ago
Fuck your taste, Mr President.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=WM7-PYtXtJM
1 year ago
Sorry, I really suck ass.
1 year ago
I'm on my last leg out, and you just fucked my buzz up, NIXY.
1 year ago
@POSSUM

EAT ME RAW, NIGGER.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LJ2qpYYBC-w
1 year ago
^EPIC VID
1 year ago
recover password
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