by Ogami89

submitted February 11th 2013

115 comments
what do you think? let everyone know!
Beer Opener
tagged:
comments (115)
idiot
5 years ago
be quiet
5 years ago
Did they just get these down in Mexico...cause the States have had them for years.
5 years ago
Looks unsanitary.
5 years ago
Yeah its pretty nasty
5 years ago
^^That's what she said
5 years ago
flip flops
5 years ago
Isn't that a twist off?
5 years ago
yes
5 years ago
but the guy's wearing flip flops with a fucking bottle opener on the sole...you can't expect much
5 years ago
Pointless really when you can have one in your phone cover.
5 years ago
Right, because I always like to have liquid around my phone, especially when I'm getting drunk.
5 years ago
pretty sure he was being facetious dush
5 years ago
It's on the backside and pretty much fool proof. Works like a charm.
5 years ago
oh. maybe not :(
5 years ago
pretty pointless when you could just not be a faggot and carry a lighter
5 years ago
Sadly, not on this one Zeke. It is a really eye turner at the bars though.
5 years ago
I don't smoke faggot.
5 years ago
please, there are hundreds of uses for a lighter
5 years ago
💘
5 years ago
i guess no one uses actual bottle openers anymore...
5 years ago
I know, always good to offer lighting a cigarette.
5 years ago
No point in carrying one around when I have to have a cover on my phone either way Heather.
5 years ago
true enough I suppose.
5 years ago
Neither phones or lighters can get wet, though.
5 years ago
What kind of fucking idiot cant open a beer without spilling it though, even if it bursts up with energy of awesome?
5 years ago
Er slight rephrase, how hard is it to avoid spilling on the opener when your doing a lifting motion anyway?
5 years ago
It's not beer getting the phone wet....
5 years ago
HINT: You're wearing flip flops
5 years ago
Rain then? If you're outside, use a corner.
5 years ago
Ah, beach.
* Jones scampers before Metal gets upset with me *
5 years ago
if you are out and are at somewhere that has unopened bottles with no fucking way to open them, you are a fucking retard.
what the fuck is this somalila? lets think of the situations where you wouldn't have access to something to open a bottle with in which you ALSO have bottles that need to be opened with a bottle opener... NONE.. fucking none at all...
btw if you really have to open a bottle that needs a bottle opener... use another fucking bottle... or a dime... or a pen... or a stick......................... or..... go somewhere that has a goddamn bottle opener ;/
5 years ago
omg this makes me so angry
5 years ago
im literally shaking with rage right now
5 years ago
Scenario: you're tubing down a river. Your trunks are soaked and you didn't bring a phone or lighter or other opener. You take off your sandal and open the beer and cheers to the lack of imagination of others.
5 years ago
'that'll be $4'
*hands you an unopened beer*
5 years ago
um.....anywhere outside
5 years ago
scenario: you are tubing down a river. you trunks are soaked and you didnt bring a phone or lighter or other opener, you then realize you have fucking sandals on that ARE COMPLETELY FUCKING CAPABLE OF OPENING A GODDAMN FUCKING BOTTLE WITHOUT HAVING A FUCKING BOTTLE OPENER EMBEDDED INTO THEM FOR FUCK SAKEJkslfjdkldsjfkafdasfdasf
5 years ago
* yak cracks keyboard in half *

* yak uses part of the circuitboard to open a beer *

5 years ago
Link or stfu
5 years ago
post a video of you opening a beer with a dime
5 years ago
im a big fan of the keychain opener, but Im just old fashioned.
5 years ago
Map.
5 years ago
IDGARA
5 years ago
Takes up precious ball-comfort space though Heather which the dime filled wallet is already hogging.
5 years ago
heather i just use a key to open beer bottles generally if there is 'nothing' around thats easier access
5 years ago
I work at a bar, I generally always have some sort of opener on me... I guess I know what the party favours at muchocon are gonna be, though.
5 years ago
Yak swims with his keys?
5 years ago
We all know Heather, you slut.
5 years ago
dont you people take things out of your pockets when you swim :(
5 years ago
These flip flops are great for Margaritaville faggets.
5 years ago
Metal swims with his flip flops on.
5 years ago
Buffet heads, whatever the fuck they're called.
5 years ago
No, but they're right there when I get out and I'm still soaked. Or in a river I don't take them off.
5 years ago
But do you only bring one beer and nothing else though?
5 years ago
all im doing now is imagining you helpless fucks with a 24 pack of beer sitting somewhere... staring at it... unable to open it... staring....
just staring....
if only there was a way to open them without using a bottle opener.......
moping....

5 years ago
lets just be real here. If you're going to the beach, and you have the presence of mind to bring beer, you most likely also have clothes, and a towel and other things. So if you cant fathom having abottle opener, keychain or otherwise, stashed in your belongings.... well then I dont know what to say to you :(
5 years ago
See tubing example. You have one beer almost done and you bring one more with you. Use the river water or your tube to open it why don't you.
5 years ago
metalface somehow goes 'tubing' with like 48 beer.. no case to carry them tho(odd) and no keys.. yet he wears flip flops and has other tools, yet no access to a rock.. or branch... or even a fucking towel...
5 years ago
Don't count me on the pro opener side of the debate yak, I just like my phone opener for the novelty of it, I'll gladly smash a bottle if it means getting it open.
5 years ago
and why arent we buying twist offs, anyway?
5 years ago
if you know youre being active.... probably should buy twist offs
5 years ago
uh if you cant open a beer bottle with your tube... you are the worlds worst beer drinker.. fucking fact
5 years ago
* DushanMandik sighs *


It's called incorporating utility with fashion. I guess we shouldn't expect much from a guy that wears wolf tshirts :/
5 years ago
Only girly beers have twist offs, at least here.
5 years ago
post a video of you opening a beer with an inner tube yak
5 years ago
get me an innertube and i will
100% fact
5 years ago
you can open a fucking beer with a goddamn towel for fuck sake
you can open it with a shoe just as easy.. hes already said he has fucking sandals on so there you go open them with sandals
this isnt fucking rocket science
5 years ago
how the fuck would I get you an inner tube?
5 years ago
Leave the keys and phone in the car. Hike up a mile with a couple beers and a tube.

/yak archer smashes the last steuben and drinks glass
5 years ago
the united states postal service
5 years ago
post a vid of you opening a beer with a dime
5 years ago
are you hiking somewhere that doesnt have a tree metalface? or a rock to use as a bottle opener?
5 years ago
*canadian dime
5 years ago
Shit, why not just use your metalface?
5 years ago
But say I'm in the river when I need to open it
5 years ago
I'm arguing for principle, jones.
5 years ago
Would you have brought the beer into the river?
5 years ago
i guess youll have to send me beer money as well ;/
since i just spend money on brewing beer
i seriously cant believe how little respect i have for you people at this moment
5 years ago
just tubing... drinking... livin the dream!
5 years ago
How are they getting along btw Yak? Any of them done, and if so did you avoid contamination?
5 years ago
I just realized that if I had the sandals then I did bring opener.

* MetalFace bono victory *
5 years ago
But would you bring them out into the middle of the river along with a beer?
5 years ago
The sandals? Yeah. To avoid foot injuries.
5 years ago
ive alraedy brewed a few batches jones... fucking delicious
so far a scottish ale (think kind of like newcastle(ishy)) and an english bitter which was awesome... right now im carbonating a raspberry wheat beer, tho i'm a little worried about it tasting raspberry-y enough, i have ingredients on order for making a dunkelweizen, since i harvested some of the yeast from my last batch with the raspberry wheat (same strain of yeast i'm using for it)
5 years ago
er.. already..
5 years ago
i guess when i buy some more beer to expand my bottling i'll have to show zeke how to open a bottle with a coin (a dime is slightly different than a bigger coin, but any coin can open a beer bottle)

thats the only time im going to actually buy beer anymore, since the beer i make is probably some of the best beer ive ever had, i cant really justify wasting money on it anymore ;/

5 years ago
Good call, dunkelweiz is pretty dank if done right. Yeah, considering the volume you get for the value its a steal considering the self satisfaction you get along with it. Are you experimenting your way to new recipes or looking up ones proven to work?
5 years ago
right now im using beersmith, its basically a program that lets you take either beer recipes that you can find/import or design your own based off of specifications of a certain style, so say you were to pick a porter it would give you the 'average' guidelines you need to kind of get the arrows into the 'safe' area to be inside that specific style (abv, color, hoppiness, maltiness etc)
so i just find recipes that i like the look of and tweak them for the equipment that i have
5 years ago
Amt Name Type # %/IBU
3 lbs 2.4 oz Munich Malt Syrup (7.0 SRM) Extract 1 43.2 %
1.00 oz Tettnang [4.50 %] - Boil 60.0 min Hop 2 12.4 IBUs
1 lbs Amber Dry Extract [Boil for 15 min](12.5 SRM) Dry Extract 3 13.7 %
3 lbs 2.4 oz Wheat Liquid Extract [Boil for 15 min](8.0 SRM) Extract 4 43.2 %
1.0 pkg Weihenstephan Weizen (Wyeast Labs #3068) [125.00 ml] Yeast 5 -

is what im brewing as soon as it gets delivered
5 years ago
i dont have a mash tun to do all grain yet so i have to do extract/partial extracts until summer prolly when i can convert our cooler into a mash tun
5 years ago
Oh yeah, a masher is essential. We started out with something very similar too called beercalc from haandbryg.dk. Lays out some good guide lines for you to build upon. Unfortunately it seems my fathers recipes are gone from there now, probably work related.
5 years ago
at the moment i only have 53$/m budgeted for beer making so i have to plan what im doing and then save up probably for an extra carboy and some other stuff.. it kind of sucks in canada since ingredients are like 2x the price of what they are in the usa... tho beer here is WAY more expensive than in the usa as well... so it kind of evens out in how much is saved per beer
5 years ago
Yeah I could imagine getting the resources would be a bitch. Do they have certain grossers for that with marked up prices or do you find individuals selling the things you need? Ingredients weren't cheap here either but we had some good connections, and the beers good beers can be very pricey here as well.
5 years ago
here (ontario) there are quite a few homebrew places, just not in this city.. the one that is in this city has only a very limited selection of malts and hops and yeast, which kinda makes sense for what windsor is, its a very blue collar place so i suspect most of them only really drink like very pale lagers or very pale ales since most of the stuff people buy here is like bud or molsen or shit like that
5 years ago
.... beer cans...

enough said.
5 years ago
Thank you Oster, seems they were ignoring the obvious.. Drink the Beer..EAT THE CAN!
5 years ago
use the can to open the beer bottle
5 years ago
or drink russian beer that has pull top bottles
5 years ago
then use the pulltop as a bottle opener
5 years ago
smash beer eat face.
5 years ago
^^ See, problem solved..
5 years ago
Adding some bath salts into the mix Oster?.. Cool..
5 years ago
Or use your badass sandals. Different strokes.
5 years ago
I looked at brewing my own sauce the other day. I came to the conclusion that I was only willing to go to the effort of producing the equivalent of hairspray and thought that wasnt worth the effort and bought some fucking rum instead
5 years ago
* smerf calmly reaches into his pocket and pulls out his pocket knife which contains (of course) a bottle opener. *
5 years ago
I've got one of those. Only it doesnt have a knife the prevent me from looking like an alcoholic. It's just a bottle opener
5 years ago
*that prevents
5 years ago
* smerf has a bottle opener on his dresser. *
5 years ago
Y'all are a bunch of pillow biters. If you can't open a beer with a menacing glance, maybe you should stick to the wine coolers.
5 years ago
I remember when these were new... 8 years ago
5 years ago
dush beat you to the point.
5 years ago
like I read what that faggot types
5 years ago
as soon as the "ignore user" function is working, you'll never have to again
5 years ago
why do I need an ignore button, I am pretty successful ignoring him now
5 years ago
recover password
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